Archive for the 'Hymamshu Jyothi Kala Peetha' Category

Random Jottings on Facebook – 4

July 22, 2014

Some of my friends talk only about EMIRATES, and some about E.M.I. RATES!

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Vimal Pan Masala has this front full page long strip ad today in TOI. At the bottom, there is this line: CHEWING OF PAN MASALA IS INJURIOUS TO HEALTH. NOT FOR MINORS.

That last line really makes you feel “For minors, it is not injurious!” 

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Yesterday,
Grandma wanted Aastha,
Grandkids wanted Pasta,
Mom made onion-less Naasta
and
Dad drove on a jam-free Raasta

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pun-inda aago olle panchaythi
punch aadmelu punch-e nad-daithi !

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Most of the time, people tell me: Ram, sing!

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Yesterday, my son taught me the spelling of HOPELESS: HO+

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Don’t be surprised to hear unnecessary honking today. Remember, yesterday was NO HONKING MONDAY.

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ಗುಂಡನ ಲೇಟೆಸ್ಟ್ ಡೌಟು: ‘Gourmet’ಗೂ ಗೋಮೇ-ಗೂ ಸಂಬಂಧ ಉಂಟಾ?

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ದೇವಸ್ಥಾನಕ್ಕೆ ಹೆಚ್ಚು ಹೋಗೋರನ್ನ ಏನಂತ ಕರೀತಾರೆ?
ದಿ ಗುಡಿ-ಗುಡಿ ಟೈಪ್ಸ್!

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In school, our seniors advised us thus: NEVER agree for an OPEN BOOK TEST (especially by Iyer Sir). If you think that the answer is in the book and the test is all about how fast you can find the answer, and copy it to the answer sheet, you are completely wrong!

I am thankful to god that I am done with school. At least once a fortnight, I get exam nightmares where I enter the class and the exam is about to begin, and I find out that I have prepared for a completely different subject.

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ಈ ನಡುವೆ ಹೆಚ್ಚು ಅನರ್ಥಗಳು ನಡೀತಿರೋದು ಏಕೆ ಗೊತ್ತಾ?
ಪ್ರಪಂಚದಲ್ಲೆಡೆ ಎಂದೋ ಒಂದು ಘಂಟೆ ಅರ್ಥ್ ಅವರ್. ಉಳಿದ ಇಪ್ಪತ್ಮೂರು ಘಂಟೆ ಅನರ್ಥವಾದ ಅವರ್.

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ನಿಮ್ಗಿಲ್ಲ… ನಮ್ಗಿದೆ ಮೀಟ್ರು!
ಅಂತ ತೋರಿಸ್ಕೊಳಕ್ಕೋಸ್ಕ್ರ ಆಟೋ ಡ್ರೈವರ್ಸು ಮೀಟರ್ ಮೇಲ್ ಹತ್ತೋ-ಇಪ್ಪತ್ತೋ ಕೇಳೋದು.

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ಸ್ಕೂಲ್-ಕಾಲೇಜ್ಗಳಲ್ಲಿ ಭಾಳಾ ಲೇಡಿ ಟೀಚರ್ಸ್ ಎಷ್ಟೇ ಬರದ್ರೂ, ಮತ್ತ್ ಬರಸ್ತಾರೆ.

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WOW! I told you so!
Truly, Shikar is The One!!!

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ಅಂದು: ಶೆಟ್ಟ್ರೆ , ಪ್ಯಾಕ್ ಕೊಡಿ.
ಇಂದು: ಟೆಟ್ರಾ ಪ್ಯಾಕ್ ಕೊಡಿ.

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ಆಡು ಮುಟ್ಟದ ಸೊಪ್ಪಿಲ್ಲ. ಬ್ಯಾನರ್ ಕಟ್ಟದ ಕಂಬವಿಲ್ಲ.

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ಮಧ್ಯಮ ಪಾಂಡವನಾದ ಅರ್ಜುನನು ರತಿಯನ್ನು ನೋಡಿದನು.

ಮೇಲಿನ ವಾಕ್ಯದ ಅರ್ಥ ಬರುವಂತೆ ಒಂದು ಪದದಲ್ಲಿ ಉತ್ತರ ನೀಡಿ.

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Traffic has become so horrible that we can’t even look towards the temple while driving. Earlier, you could stop in front of a temple and say the stotra of that particular god/dess. Kaligaala!

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On the way to office, I saw Upendra’s ‘Topiwala’ posters in reverse but title in the same order. Another gimmick! And the tagline is catchy: Thale Illadavrigalla!
‘A’ is still talked about for its creative tagline: Buddhivantarige maatra!

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ಬರ್ತಾ ಬರ್ತಾ ಭರ್ತನ್ ಕಥೆ ಮರೀತಾ ಬರ್ತಿದೀವಿ.

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Instant coffee I despise. Constant coffee I admire.

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ಬೆಣ್ಣೆ ದೋಸೆ ಮಾಡೋಂದು: ಬೆಣ್ಣೆ ಹಚ್ಚೋ ಕೆಲ್ಸ
ಬಕೆಟ್ ಮಾರೋಂದು: ಬಕೆಟ್ ಹಿಡ್ಯೋ ಕೆಲ್ಸ
ಸೈಕಲ್ ಬ್ಲೋ ಹೊಡ್ಯೋಂದು: ಪಂಪೊಡ್ಯೋ ಕೆಲ್ಸ
ಪಾಲಿಷ್ ಮಾಡೋಂದು: ಉಜ್ಜಾಡೋ ಕೆಲ್ಸ

ನಿಮ್ದ್ಯಾವ್ ಕೆಲ್ಸ?

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I don’t know what happens after we die. But of one thing I’m sure: The dead have an access to Facebook and Newspapers. Because those who pay tributes, write it in direct speech (directly to the person who has expired).

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A popular quirk during primary school days: GREEN TOUCH !!

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Grandson and Paati went to a Mall.
Grandson entered Armani shop.
Paati followed without noticing the board.

Grandson: Paati, wait here. Will visit the next store and be back here in Armani.
After waiting for 45 minutes, Paati called her grandson on his mobile: Yennada, you told you will be back in Ar-mani!

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Most of the Law and CA firms have the same name twice: Eg.: Keshav & Keshav. Sharma & Sharma. Mohan & Mohan, Kumar and Kumar etc. etc..!

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What is the difference between me and Vani Murthy ?
I love posters. She, Composters.

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Simple Interest: People with simple interests in life – like Coffee, newspaper, good food…

Compound Interest: People who are only wanting to buy property and build a compound around it.

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By 1985, PB Srinivas was 55 years old, and sang rarely. But this number that he sang for ‘Bettada Hoovu’ is a gem. His voice suits perfectly to that of the teacher’s expression. The line when he sings “Olle maathugalaadisu, Olle kelasava maadisu, Olle daariyalemma nadesu, vidyeya kalisu“, brings tears in my eyes.

One of my all time favourites.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m4u3baXkJAc

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ವೋಟ್ ಹಾಕಿದ್ರೆ ಸತ್ಪ್ರಜೆ. ಇಲ್ದಿದ್ರೆ ಸತ್ತ ಪ್ರಜೆ.

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First under 40 in my booth to cast my vote. Third overall! Immediately, had a heavenly Chutney along with Uppit at Surya with Srividhya CB.

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Kids are thrilled to see those white thick lines on every other road. They’re using it as Crease, Badminton net, Boundary line…

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Yesterday. I remembered HW Longfellow after a long time.
Courtesy: Kannada News channels showing guys with LONGS walking in Kolar.

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A leaflet dropped out of the newspaper today. It was about a place called Spell Genie. I found 2 spelling and 4 grammatical errors.

If you visit their page, you can find several more errors.

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According to a survey conducted by N-Obo-DY, starting today, 63.57% voters will see their ring fingers every 2 hours a day for the next 1 month and think when the MARK will vanish.

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Back from AVM Studios, Chennai. Won 3 lakh 20 Thousand in Kannadada Kotyadhipati ! The episodes will be aired betw. May 20-24th. Thanks toSrividhya CB who stood rock solid behind me in PROJECT KK!

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ಓಲ್ಡ್: ಶಿವ್ಪೂಜೇಲ್ ಕರ್ಡಿ.
ನ್ಯೂ: ಕನ್ನಡ ಅಕ್ಷರದ ಮಧ್ಯೆ ರೆಕ್ಟ್ಯಾಂಗಲ್.

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ಯಾವ ಕನ್ನಡದೋರ್ ಮನೇಗ್ ಮಹೇಶ್ ಭೂಪತಿ ಹೋದ್ರೂ, ಅವನಿಗೆ ಫಸ್ಟ್ ಕೇಳ್ಸೋ ಮಾತು : ಬಂದ ಭೂಪತಿ!

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Match-fixing is not new to Indians. Elderly women have been known to fixing matches in India for ages.

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Lost PBS last month. Now TMS. Both had lent their voices to Dr.Rajkumar in the early part of his career. The song ‘Raajara Mahalinali’ is a famous TM Soundararajan number sung for Annavru for the film ‘Simha Swapna’ (1968). TMS first sang for Raj in ‘Premamayi’ (1966).

TMS sang mostly for MGR and Sivaji Ganesan apart from NTR, Gemini Ganesan, Rajkumar, ANR, Rajanikanth, Kamal Haasan among other actors from 1946 till 2007.

RIP, TMS.

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Am sure all of you have seen Google’s ‘Petri Dish’ tribute today to the German microbiologist, Julius Richard Petri.

Q: If he knew Hindi, which song would Julius Richard Petri sing?

A: ‘Agar’ tum na hote!

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ಇತ್ತೀಚಿನವರ್ಗೂ, ಘಂಟೆ ಬಾರ್ಸಿದ್ರೆ, ಪೂಜೆ ನಡೀತಿದೆ ಅಂದ್ಕೊಬೋದಿತ್ತು.

ಈಗೀಗ, ಶಾಸ್ತ್ರಿಗಳು, ಕಸ ಎತ್ತೋರು, ಗಾಡಿಗಳಲ್ಲಿ ಐಸ್ ಕ್ರೀಮ್ ಮತ್ತು ಜೋಳ ಮಾರೋರು, ಎಲ್ಲರೂ ಘಂಟೆ ಬಾರ್ಸೋರೆ!

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Bramhaaaanda Narendra Babu Sharma admires English more than anybody. His favourite 3 English words: Put, Go, See!

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Most of us have seen at the end of any emailer:
• Sent from Samsung Galaxy Note
• Sent from BlackBerry® on Airtel
• Sent from Samsung Mobile
• Sent from my Nokia phone
and so on

Imagine these in the ancient times:
• Sent from Carrier Pigeon
• Sent from Racing Homer
• Sent from American Show Racer
• Sent from Homing Pigeon
• Sent from Pigeon Racing
• Sent from Release Dove
• Sent from English Carrier
• Sent from Passenger Pigeon
• Sent from Cloud Messenger
• Sent from Cloud Meghadooth®
• Sent from Megha Sandesha®
• Sent from Smoke Signal Yamana
• Sent from Long Distance Smoke Signal®

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When my parents got married, out-of-towners who couldn’t attend sent telegrams. When father passed away, people sent faxes. When mother expired, email messages. For my marriage, friends sent SMSes. When my son was born, people wished us using instant messaging on social media.

What will be the next generation of messaging?

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Hotels, Temples and Beauty Saloons: 3 things that you’ll find on most roads in Malleswaram today!

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Two foreigners visited the temple at Kashi where they heard the ‘Annapoorna Stotra’. As the stotra came to an end, one told the other: Didn’t I tell you, there are lots of curries in India?

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Markandeya challenging Yama… we all know. But after hearing to his composition “Chandrashekara Ashtakam”, I got to know Markandeya did not like YAMAHA too… coz after every stanza, he asks: “Why Yamaha?”

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ATMAVALOKANA was organised and invites were distributed. People were surprised that the organiser and venue was a Bank. Only after the function started, most of the audience got to know it was ATM Avalokana!

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Under RICE ITEMS of Adiga’s Sampige menu, one item stands out: VEG HANDI PULAO!

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ಅಲ್ಲಿ ಮಳೆ ಬಂದು ಹಲವಾರು ಜನ ಮನೆಯಿಂದ ಕೊಚ್ಚ್ಕೊಂಡ್ ಹೋಗ್ತಿದ್ದಾರೆ.
ಸ್ನೇಹಿತನಿಗೆ ಬಿಸಿ ಪಕೋಡ ಕೊಡಿಸಿದೆ ಅಂತ ಹೇಳಿಕೊಂಡು ಇಲ್ಲಿಬ್ಬರು ಕೊಚ್ಚ್ಕೊಂಡ್ ಹೋಗ್ತಿದ್ದಾರೆ.

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I will always remember Williams saying to Han in ‘Enter the Dragon’ -
Bullshit mister han man… you come right out of comic…

RIP Jim Kelly.
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/entertainment-arts-23125488

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rwb-bril

5th Standard was when Ink Pens ‘officially’ came into our life! You had to earn a ‘Hero’ pen, which was never bought. Until you earned one, it was some local pen, which invariably leaked. Hence a blotting paper or a piece of cotton cloth).

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rwb-ontikoppalpanchanga

One family from Mysore has the pride of writing and printing Panchanga continuously for the past 126 years. The Vontikoppal Panchanga was started by Siddanthi Tammaiah Shastry in 1887-88. Presently, the fifth generation of the family is carrying on the work. Vontikoppal Panchanga is the first in the world to bring out a Panchanga exclusively for America.

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Rewind back to the ’80s: There was a mad man called Manikya near my cousin’s place. He was not totally mad. He used to do jobs like cleaning the garden etc. But the interesting part was that after doing the job, he used to ask for a brand and crisp 5 rupee note. It HAD to be crisp, just like you get in RBI. A soiled note would irritate him completely. He often used to tell us kids (then) that his wife ran off with MGR.

Why did I remember this? My son is learning for his Kannada test tomorrow. And he has a sentence. “Maatu Maanikya”!

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ಮಕ್ಕಳಾದಾಗ, ಬಿ.ಸಿ.ಜಿ.
ವಯಸ್ಸಾದ್ಮೇಲೆ, ಈ.ಸಿ.ಜಿ.
***
ಹುಟ್ಟಿದಾಗ ಬಾಲ ಭಾಷೆ. ಕ್ರಿಕೆಟ್ ಆಟ ಕಲಿತ ಮೇಲೆ ’ಬಾಲ್’ ಭಾಷೆ. ವಯಸ್ಸಿಗೆ ಬಂದಮೇಲೆ, ಎಲ್.ಕೆ.ಬಾಲ್ ಭಾಷೆ!

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Right from childhood, Bengluru born Shaiju Kutty is very fond of his mother and the Tea she prepares, so much so that he becomes an expert Tea maker. Seeing her son’s interest in Tea making, she helps Shaju to set up a Tea shop in a layout where Mallu kutties are in majority.

Q: What name does Shaiju keep for the tea shop?

A: ‘Mathru Chaaya”

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Grandson: Thatha, you have Windows 8?
Thatha: Wait, let me remember: 4, plus 2… plus 2, PLUS TWO. Windows 10, not 8.
Grandson: ?!?!

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rwb-notebook

Different Eras, Different Notebooks!

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Pran fan: Ab no more Pran yaar.
Sea-food lover: OMG! No more Prawn?!

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ಸಿವಾ, ಯಂಗಾಬಿಟವ್ನೆ ನಮ್ ಶಿವಣ್ಣ!
ಸಿವಾ, YOUNG ಆಗ್ಬಿಟವ್ನೆ ನಮ್ ಶಿವಣ್ಣ!

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ಇದೀಗ ಬಂದ ಸುದ್ದಿ
ರಚನೆ: ಬೆಳ್ಳೂರು ರಾಮಕೃಷ್ಣ

ಆಶ್ರಯ ಸ್ಕೀಂನಿಂದ ಸಿಗ್ತು ಮನೆ
ಅಕ್ಕಿ ಸ್ಕೀಂನಿಂದ ಆಯ್ತು ಅಡಿಗೆ ಘಮ್ಮನೆ
ಊರೆಲ್ಲಾ ವೈನ್ ಅಂಗಡಿ ಬಾ ಎಂದು ಕರೀತು ನನ್ನನ್ನೆ
ಇನ್ಯಾಕೆ ಬೇಕು ಅಂತ ಟಾಟಾ ಮಾಡಿ ಕೆಲ್ಸಕ್ಕೆ ಮಲಗ್ದೆ ಸುಮ್ಮನೆ

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raw hullu ≠ con grassu

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rwb-sportstar1983

Yours truly with The Sportstar, 1983 issue (World Cup special)

Aside: Was about to share this picture on June 25th, last month, to commemorate India’s first WC triumph. Right then, got a call from my son’s school that he had a fall and has a dislocated bone. The cast will be removed tomorrow. He thus ‘single- handedly’ completed his first Unit test in flying colours!

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rwb-ddnewsreadersold

Remembered Doordarshan’s Newsreaders:

Gitanjali Aiyar (small bindhi; almost like a model)
Minu (big bindi, bob cut)
Preet Bedi
Sashi Kumar (beard; a slight hunch)
Sarla Maheshwari (gujju style saree; sati savitri look)
Sunit Tandon (like a patient)
Neeti Ravindran (mole on a chubby cheek, bob cut)
Rini Simon (later khanna, boy cut)
Tejeshwar Singh (shekhar kapur style beard; thick, grave voice)
Sangeeta Bedi (hot and beautiful)
Komal GB Singh (ready to smile)
Usha Albuquerque (bony; gingerly expression)
Salma Sultana (‘rose’)
Kaveri Mukherjee (shrill voice)
J.V.raman (combover)
Avinash Kaur Sarin (top knot)
Rajiv Mehrotra (beard)
Shobhana Jagdhish (gujju style saree; sleepy eyes)
Ved Prakash (Tie on shirt)

By the by, does anyone remember hearing this?
This is ‘Ole’ India Radio. The News, read by Lotika Ratnam…

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Treat your son as a friend after a certain age ಅಂತ ಹೇಳೋದನ್ನೇ ನಮ್ಮೋರು ಭಾಳಾ ಚೆನ್ನಾಗಿ ಎರಡೇ ಪದದಲ್ಲಿ ಹೇಳ್ಕೊಂಬರ್ತಿದಾರೆ.

ಆ ಎರಡು ಪದಗಳೇ: Buddy ಮಗ!

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| guruvina gulaamanaaguva thanaka doreyadenna mukuthi |
|| annavre namm guru endhodane hecchuvudu namma bhakuti ||

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modi-rahul-anagram

NARENDRA MODI = Dream And Iron
RAHUL GANDHI = A Darling Huh

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rwb-thama

Definitely ‘The Thama Stories’ are not to be missed.

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On CNBC Awaaz, every night you can watch Awaaz @ 9 (in Hindi).
On our roads, every day and night you can watch Awaaz 24/7 (all languages).

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rwb-brc

I regret to inform that my uncle Sri B R Chandrashekhara Rao, Retired Teacher and Former Headmaster of National High School, Basavanagudi, Bangalore, passed away this morning at 11.15am at his residence. Fondly known to many of his students as BRC, he was known for his inimitable voice that commanded respect. He was a strict disciplinarian and was a stickler to perfection. Everyday, he wore white bush shirt and a crisp dark trouser, neatly pressed. And it was full navy whites on Saturdays. A man of principles and integrity, BRC represented the values NHS stood for. Students really loved him and felt it a blessing to have him as a teacher and NCC officer.

May the departed soul rest in peace.

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rwb-allmodis

All the MODIs that I have heard, seen and read about (in chronological order)

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A Manipuri will surely appreciate that there is a Mary Kom Ba temple in our city!

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rwb-kvc

KV Chandrashekar (1920-2014)
May the departed soul rest in peace.

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rwb-kvm-malatiprakash

Our beloved Hindi teacher at KV Malleswaram, Smt.Malathi Prakash passed away yesterday. भगवान उनकी आत्मा को शांति दे।

***

ಕೆಲವರಿಗೆ, ಲವ್ ಈಸ್ ಪಾಯಿಸನ್.
ಇನ್ನು ಕೆಲವರಿಗೆ, ಲವ್ ಈಸ್ ಪಾಯಸಮ್.

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ಸಿಕಾಪಟ್ಟೆ ಲೆಂತೀ ಫಿಲಂ ಮತ್ತು ಬಹುತೇಕ ಕನ್ನಡದ ಫಿಲಂಗಳಲ್ಲಿರೋ ವ್ಯತ್ಯಾಸ? One is much long…the other is ಮಚ್ಚು-ಲಾಂಗು.

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rwb-oldschool-newschool

Old School of Thought vs New School of Thought.

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rwb-arnab-rahul-timesnow

Just imagine!

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yocall issonweight as the person you are trying to reach isonanather call

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Here’s my Facebook movie. Find yours at https://facebook.com/lookback/#FacebookIs10

I liked this 62 second video for the mood-setting instrumental bgm. It was like the Team Facebook telling me ‘Thank you’!

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ಚಿಕ್ಕ ವಯಸ್ಸಲ್ಲಿ ಅಜೈಲ್.
ವಯಸ್ಸಾದ ಮೇಲೆ ಫ್ರಜೈಲ್.

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rwb-tigerpran

No one can encourage and shower praises like our beloved TIGER Pran! Dear Sir, a heartfelt thanks for all those words of encouragement, likes, comments, positive words, appreciation, support, thoughtfulness and most importantly, for your time! Thank you very much from all of us at Muktabalaga, and from everyone in the social media network to whom you have had a kind word to say! You deserved this long back. Sorry for the delay. – Regards, Bellur
[Needless to say, we hope to see more and more of your comments, likes and shares]

 — with Praneshachar Kadalabal.

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ಡ ಗುಣಿತ ಹೀಗಿದೆ:
ಡ ಡಾ ಡಿ ಡೀ ಡು ಡೂ ಡೃ ಡೄ ಡೆ ಡೇ ಡೈ ಡೊ ಡೋ ಡೌ ಡಂ ಡಃ
ಗಮನಿಸಿ: ಡೌ comes at #14!

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Pallavi Anupallavi. Moondram Pirai. Olangal. Shankarabharanam. Each one a masterpiece. Each one in a different language. One man. Balu Mahendra. RiP.

Here is one of my favourites from Balu Manhendra’s 1982 directorial, ‘Olangal’ where our Cubbon Park has been captured in all its beauty, along with the evergreen ‘Toy train’.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xAl7_PiZV9I

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Flex banners at many traffic signals has a picture of Dravid and a message saying “When on the road, always say Pehle Aap”.

Just wondering if Dravid is an AAP member!

Imagine two very generous drivers – one on a Bolero, and another on a Scorpio, meet near an intersection somewhere in the interiors of N.R. Colony. One says “Pehle aap”…the other says…” no sir, pehle aap”…goes on and on… neither of them moves ahead…because they want to follow the PEHLE AAP rule. Result: Traffic jam because of Jammy!

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weekendಉ ಅಂತ ಹಲವರ ಚಿಂತೆ. Year endಉ ಅಂತ ಕೆಲವರ ಚಿಂತೆ. ಹೊರಗೆ ರೋಡಲ್ಲಿ, ಯಾರದ್ದೋ Life endಉ ಅಂತ ಉಳಿದವರ ಚಿಂತೆ.

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ಇಂದು ಊರಿಗೆ ಬಂದ್ರೆ, ಅವಳಮ್ಮ ನೆಂಟ್ರಿಗೆಲ್ಲ ಮೆಸೇಜ್ ಕಳ್ಸೋದು only in 2 words :
ನಗರದಲ್ಲಿ ಇಂದು.

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ಹುಟ್ಟಿದ ಕ್ಷಣವೇ ಸಾವಿನೊಂದಿಗೆ ನಮ್ಮ ನಿಶ್ಚಿತಾರ್ಥ ಆಗಿ ಹೋಗಿದೆ. ಅನಿಶ್ಚಿತವಾಗಿರೋದು ಬದುಕು, ಸಾವಲ್ಲ. (ಮಳೆ ಹನಿಗಳು ಬರಿಸಿದ ಅನಿಸಿಕೆ)

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ಡೈಲಿ ನಾವ್ ಯೂಜ಼್ ಮಾಡೋ ಕೆಲವು ಪಾಪ್ಯುಲರ್ ನಂಬರ್ಸ್

ಒಂದ್ ನಿಮಿಷ ಇರಪ್ಪ.
ಇದು ಎರಡನೇ ಸಲ ನಾನ್ ಹೇಳ್ತಿರೋದು.
ಮೂರ್ ಹೊತ್ತೂ ಅದೇ ಗೋಳು.
ನಾಲ್ಕು ಅಂಗಡಿಲಿ ಕೇಳು.
ಐದೈದ್ ನಿಮಿಷಕ್ಕೂ ಫೋನ್ ಮಾಡ್ಬೇಡ.
ಇಪ್ಪತ್ತೆಂಟು ಕೆಲಸ ಬೆಳಿಗ್ಗೆ ಇಂದ.
ನೂರು ಸರತಿ ಹೇಳಿದ್ರೂ ಅದೇ ತಪ್ಪು ಮಾಡಿದ್ಯಾ!

ನಿಮ್ಮ ನಂಬರ್ಸ್ ಯಾವುದು?

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ಕೆಲವರು ಪ್ರತಿದಿನ ಹಕ್ಕು ಚಲಾಯಿಸ್ತಾರೆ. ಇನ್ನು ಕೆಲವರು ಐದು ವರ್ಷಕ್ಕೊಮ್ಮೆ ಚಲಾಯಿಸ್ತಾರೆ.
ಮಾರಲ್ ಆಫ್ ದಿ ಸ್ಟೋರಿ: ಬೆಂಗಳೂರಿಗಿಂತ ಬೇರೇ ಊರಿನವರೇ ಹೆಚ್ಚು ಹಕ್ಕು ಚಲಾಯಿಸ್ತಾರೆ.

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ಪಕ್ಕದ್ ಮನೆಯೋರು, ಡೈಲಿ ಮನೇಲಿ ಓಟ್ ಮಾಡ್ತಾರೆ. ನಿನ್ನೆ ಮಾತ್ರ ಮನೆ ಹೊರಗೂ ವೋಟ್ ಮಾಡಿದ್ರು.

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ಎಲೆಕ್ಷನ್ ಆದ ಕೆಲವು ದಿವಸ, ಪೊಲಿಂಗ್ ಬೂತ್ ಸುತ್ತ ಮುತ್ತದ ರಸ್ತೆಗಳಲ್ಲಿ ಕ್ರಿಕೆಟ್, ಬ್ಯಾಡ್ಮಿಂಟನ್, ಟೆನ್ನಿಸ್ ಆಟ ಆಡೋ ಮಕ್ಕಳಿಗೆ, ಬೌಂಡರಿ ಲೈನ್ ಹಾಕೋ ಗೋಳಿರಲ್ಲ.

ಹಳೆ ಟೆಲಿಫೋನ್ ಡೈರೆಕ್ಟರಿ ಕೊಟ್ಟು ಹೊಸದನ್ನ ತಂದು, ಟೆಲಿಫೋನ್ ಎಕ್ಸ್ಚೇಂಜಲ್ಲಿ ಕೊಂಡಿರೋ ಪ್ಲಾಸ್ಟಿಕ್ ಕವರ್ ಹಾಕಿ, ಅದರಲ್ಲಿ ನಮ್ಮ ಅಪ್ಪ/ ಅಮ್ಮ, ನೆಂಟರು ಸ್ನೇಹಿತರ ಹೆಸರು ಹುಡುಕಿ ಕಾಲ ಕಳೇಯೋ ಕಾಲ ಒಂದಿತ್ತು.

ಅವರ ಹೆಸರಿಲ್ಲದಿದ್ದರೆ, ತಕ್ಷಣ ಫೋನ್ ಮಾಡಿ ಕೇಳೋದು: ಏನ್, ನಿಮ್ಮ್ ಹೆಸರಿಲ್ಲ ಈ ಸರ್ತಿ, ಡೈರೆಕ್ಟ್ರೀಲಿ?
ಅವರು: ಹೌದಾ, ಹಾಗಾದ್ರೆ ಈಗಲೆ ಕಂಪ್ಲೇಂಟ್ ಮಾಡ್ತಿನಿ!
[ಆಗ ನಮಗೇನೋ ಚೀಪ್ ತ್ರಿಲ್ಲು!)

By the by, ಇವತ್ತು ಕನ್ನಡದಲ್ಲಿ ಬರ್ತ್ ಡೇ ಅಂತ ಟೈಪ್ ಮಾಡಬೇಕಾದ್ರೆ ’ಬ್’ ಮಿಸ್ ಆದ್ರೂ ಅರ್ಥ ಕೊಡತ್ತೆ.
ಹುಟ್ಟು ಹಬ್ಬ ಆಚರಿಸುತ್ತಿರೋರಿಗೆಲ್ಲಾ ಹ್ಯಾಪಿ ಬರ್ತ್ ಡೇ ಆನ್ ಅರ್ತ್ ಡೇ!

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ಟಿಲ್ ರೀಸೆಂಟ್ಲಿ, ವಿಜ಼ಿಲ್ ಶಬ್ಧ ಕೇಳಿದ್ರೆ, ’ಪೋಲೀಸ್’ ಅಂದ್ಕೊಳ್ತಿದ್ವಿ. ಈಗ್ ವಿಜ಼ಿಲ್ ಸದ್ದು ಕೇಳಿದ್ರೆ, ’ಪೋಲೀಸ್’ ಅಲ್ಲ, ’ಕಸದ್ ಡಬ್ಬ’ ಒಂದೇ ತಲೇಗ್ ಬರೋದು.

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ಅಣ್ಣಾವ್ರ ಅಭಿಮಾನಿಗಳಿಗೆ ಸೈನ್ಸ್ ಅಲ್ಲಿ ಒಂದು ವಿಷಯದ ಬಗ್ಗೆ ಪರ್ಫೆಕ್ಟಾಗಿ ಗೊತ್ತು: ಗುರುತ್ವಾಕರ್ಷಣೆ.

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Contradicting Proverbs

All good things come to those who wait.
BUT… Time and tide wait for no man.

The pen is mightier than the sword.
BUT… Actions speak louder than words.

Wise men think alike.
BUT… Fools seldom differ.

The best things in life are free.
BUT… There’s no such thing as a free lunch .

Slow and steady wins the race.
BUT… Time waits for no man .

Look before you leap.
BUT… Strike while the iron is hot

Do it well, or not at all.
BUT… Half a loaf is better than none.

Birds of a feather flock together.
BUT… Opposites attract.

Don’t cross your bridges before you come to them.
BUT… Forewarned is forearmed.

Doubt is the beginning of wisdom.
BUT… Faith will move mountains.

Great starts make great finishes.
BUT… It ain’t over ’till it’s over.

Practice makes perfect.
BUT… All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy.

Silence is golden.
BUT… The squeaky wheel gets the grease.

You’re never too old to learn.
BUT… You can’t teach an old dog new tricks

Absence makes the heart grow fonder.
BUT… Out of sight, out of mind.

Too many cooks spoil the broth.
BUT… Many hands make light work.

(Am sure there are more. Please add to the list.)

***

‘Master’ Hirannaiah met CM Siddaramaiah and tendered an apology at the latter’s house in “T.K.” Layout!

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ಮಿನಿಶ್ಟ್ರು (ಎಸ್ಸೆಲ್ಸಿಲಿರೋ ಮಗನಿಗೆ): ಯೇನ್ಲಾ, ಇಟ್ಟೇಯಾ?
ಮಗ: ೧೬ನೇ ತಾರೀಕ್ ತನ್ಕ ತಡ್ಕ. ಆಮೇಲ್ ಮಾತಾಡ್ತೀನಿ.

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ಜಯ, ಮಮತ ಇರೋವರೆಗೂ, ಅಮ್ಮನ್ ಅಕ್ಕನ್ ಮಾತೇ ನಡೆಯೋದು.

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Be it history or current updates, MODI has both RSS & RSS Feeds to help him!  

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ಕನ್ನಡ ಚಿತ್ರದ ಟೈಟಲ್ನಲ್ಲಿ ’ಕೇಸರಿ’ ಪದ ಬಳಸಿರೋದು ಎರಡೇ ಬಾರಿ ಅನ್ನಿಸುತ್ತೆ: ೧೯೬೩ರಲ್ಲಿ ’ವೀರ ಕೇಸರಿ’, ೨೦೧೪ರಲ್ಲಿ ’ಗಜಕೇಸರಿ’! ಹೌದಾ?

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rwb-hoteltypos

Don’t miss the taglines!

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ಬಿ.ಎ. ನೋ ಬಿ.ಕಾಮೋ, ಲೈಫಲ್ ಏನೇ ಬಂದ್ರೂ ಯು ಮಸ್ಟ್ ಬೀ ಕಾಮ್.

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rwb-aluminiumbox

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ಎಲ್ಲಾರ್ಗೂ TK ಒಂದ್ ಕಡೆ ಇದ್ದ್ರೆ, ಕಿಂಗ್ಸ್ ಇಲೆವೆನ್ ಪಂಜಾಬೋರ್ಗೆ ಬಲಗಡೆ ತೊಡೆ ಮೇಲಿದೆ!

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ಮಾತೆಯರಲ್ಲಿ, ಮೀರಮ್ಮ ಆದ್ಮೇಲೆ ಸುಮಿತ್ರಮ್ಮನೇ ಎರಡನೇ ಸ್ಪೀಕರ್ ಅಂತೆ. ಮಾತೆಯರಿಗೆ ’ಮಾತೆ’ ಆಡದೆ ಇರಕ್ಕೆ ಅಗತ್ತಾ? ಅಂದಮೇಲೆ, ಪ್ರತಿಯೊಬ್ಬ ಮಾತೇನೂ ಸ್ಪೀಕರ್. ಕೆಲವರು ಲೌಡ್ ಸ್ಪೀಕರ್.
{ಡೌಟ್ ಇದ್ದರೆ, ಮನೇಲಿ ಮಕ್ಕಳನ್ನ, ಗಂಡನ್ನ ಕೇಳಿ – ಮನೇಲಿ ಸ್ಪೀಕರ್ ಯಾರು ಅಂತ}

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To take ಅನ್ನೊ ಅರ್ಥ ಕೊಡೊ ಎರಡು ಕಂಪನಿಗಳಿವೆ. ಒಬ್ಬರ ಹೆಸರಲ್ಲಿ ಅದು raw ಆಗಿದ್ದರೆ ಇನ್ನೊಬ್ಬರ ಹೆಸರಲ್ಲಿ ಅದು polished ಅನ್ನಿಸುತ್ತೆ. ಯಾವ ಸಂಸ್ಥೆಗಳು?

Syska ಮತ್ತು Cisco.
[ಎರಡ್ರಲ್ಲು, ತಿಂಗಳ ಕೊನೇಲಿ ಸಂಬಳ ಇಸ್ಕ / ಇಸ್ಕೊ!]

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ಕೆಲವರಿಗೆ ಪದಗಳಲ್ಲಿ ’ಪ’ ಮತ್ತು ’ಫ’ ಇದ್ದರೆ ಉಚ್ಛಾರಣೆ ತಪ್ಪು ಮಾಡ್ತಾರೆ. ಉದಾ: ಪಫ್ಸ್ ಬಿಕಮ್ಸ್ ಪಪ್ಸ್. ಫಸ್ಟ್ ಬಿಕಮ್ಸ್ ಪಸ್ಟ್, ಪ್ರೊಫೆಶನಲ್ಸ್ ಬಿಕಮ್ಸ್ ಫ್ರಫೆಶನಲ್ಸ್ ಹೀಗೆ. ಅವರು ಹಾಗೆ ಹೇಳ್ದಾಗೆಲ್ಲ
ಮನಸಲ್ಲೇ ಕರೆಕ್ಟ್ ಉಚ್ಛಾರಣೆ ನಾವ್ ಮಾಡ್ಕೊಂಡಿರ್ತೀವಿ.

ಅದೇ ಎಷ್ಟು ಅಭ್ಯಾಸ ಆಗಿ ಹೋಗಿದೆ ಅಂದ್ರೆ, ಯಾರಾದ್ರೂ ಫೀಫಾ ಅಂದ್ರೆ ಮೈನ್ಡಲ್ಲಿ ಪೀಪಾ ಅಂತ ಬರತ್ತೆ!

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“ಹಾಲಿನ ಮೊಗದವಳೆ” ಅಂತ ಏನಾದ್ರು ಹುಡುಗಿಯನ್ನ ಹೊಗಳದ್ರೋ, ಓವರ್ನೈಟ್ ಅವರು ’ಹೆಪ್’ ಆಗ್ತಾರೆ. ಜೋಕೆ!

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ಕತ್ತು ಉಳುಕಿ ಒಂದ್ ವಾರ ಆಯ್ತು. ಮಸಾಜು, ಬಿಸಿನೀರ್ ಶಾಖ, ವೋಲಿನಿ ಸ್ಪ್ರೆ, ಅಯೋಡೆಕ್ಸ್ ಎಲ್ಲ ಕೊಡೋ ರಿಲೀಫ್ ಕಮ್ಮಿ. ಮನೆಯಿಂದ ಆಫೀಸ್ ವರೆಗೂ ಹಂಪ್ ಮೇಲೆ ಗಾಡಿ ಓಡಿಸಿಕೊಂಡು ಹೋದಾಗ ಸಿಗೋ ರಿಲೀಫ್, ಏನ್ ಹಿತವಾಗಿರತ್ತೆ ಗೊತ್ತಾ? ಹಂಪ್ ಗಳ ವ್ಯಾಲ್ಯು ಈಗ ಗೊತ್ತಾಯ್ತು!

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ಸೆಲ್ಫ್ ಗೋಲ್ ಮಾಡ್ಕೊಳೋದು ತಪ್ಪು.
ಸೆಲ್ಫಿನೇ ಗೋಲ್ ಮಾಡ್ಕೊಳೋದೂ ತಪ್ಪು.

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ಕಾಮತ್ ಹೋಟೆಲ್ಗೆ ಹೋಗೋದೇ ಮಜಾ ಆ ದಿನಗಳಲ್ಲಿ. ಯಾಕಂದ್ರೆ ತಿಂಡಿ ಕಾಫಿ ಆದಮೇಲೆ ಎಂಟ್ರೆನ್ಸ್ ಹತ್ತಿರ ಇಟ್ಟಿದ್ದ ವೇಯಿಂಗ್ ಮೆಶೀನ್ ಮೇಲೆ ನಿಂತು ವೇಯ್ಟ್ ಚೆಕ್ ಮಾಡಿಕೊಳ್ಳೋದೇ ಥ್ರಿಲ್ಲು! ಮುಖ್ಯವಾಗಿ ನನಗೆ ವೇಯ್ಟ್ ನೋಡ್ಕೊಳ್ಳೋದಲ್ಲ ಉದ್ದೇಶ. ಪುಟ್ಟದೊಂದು ಪಾಪಪ್ ಕಾರ್ಡ್ ಬರೋದು. ಅದರಲ್ಲಿ ಯಾವುದಾದ್ರೋ ನಟ-ನಟಿಯರ ಚಿತ್ರ, ನಮ್ಮ ವೇಯ್ಟು, ಕಾರ್ಡ್ ಹಿಂಭಾಗದಲ್ಲಿ ನಮ್ಮ ಭವಿಷ್ಯ!
ಫ್ರಸ್ಟ್ರೇಶನ್ ಆಗ್ತಿದ್ದಿದ್ದು: ನನಗೆ ಭಾರತಿನೋ, ಮಂಜುಳನೋ ಬಂದಾಗ. ಒಮ್ಮೊಮ್ಮೆ ಹತ್ತು-ಹತ್ತು ಬಾರಿ ನಿಂತಿದೀನಿ, ಅಣ್ಣಾವ್ರು ಬರಲಿ ಅಂತ!

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ಜೀವನದಲ್ಲಿ ಎಲ್ಲಕ್ಕೂ ಒಂದು ರಿದಂ ಇದೆ. ಎಲ್ಲ ಹಂತ ಹಂತವಾಗಿ ನಡೆಯುತ್ತೆ. ಎವೆರಿತಿಂಗ್ ಗೋಸ್ ಇನ್ ಎ ರಿದಮ್. ಸಿಂಪಲ್ಲಾಗ್ ಅದನ್ನ ಆಲ್-ಗೋ-ರಿದಮ್ ಅಂತ ಕರೀತೀವಿ.

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’ಜೈ’!
ನನಗೆ ಗೊತ್ತಿರೋ ಮಟ್ಟಿಗೆ, ಈ ಪದವನ್ನು ನಾವು ಬಹಳ ಫ್ಲೆಕ್ಸಿಬಲ್ ಆಗಿ ಉಪಯೋಗಿಸಬಹುದು.
ಉದಾ:
ಕನ್ನಡಕ್ಕೆ ಜೈ (ಜಯಕಾರ)
ಪಕ್ಕದ ಮನೆ ತಾತಾ? ನಿನ್ನೆ ರಾತ್ರಿ ಜೈ (ಗೊಟಕ್)
ಹಳೇ ಚಪ್ಪಲಿ ಏನಾಯ್ತು? ದೇವಸ್ಥಾನಕ್ಕೆ ಹೋಗಿದ್ದೆ. ಜೈ. (ಕಳೆದುಹೋಯಿತು)
ಏನಪ್ಪ, ಹೊಸ ಮೊಬೈಲು? ಹಳೇದು ನೀರಲ್ಲಿ ಬಿದ್ದು ಜೈ. (ಕೆಟ್ಟುಹೋಯಿತು)
ಬೇಜಾನ್ ಸೊಳ್ಳೆ ಕಾಟ. ಗುಡ್ ನೈಟ್ ಇದ್ದರೆ ಜೈ. (ಒಳ್ಳೇದು)

ಇಷ್ಟು ಫ್ಲೆಕ್ಸಿಬಲ್ ಆಗಿರೋ ಬೇರೆ ಪದಗಳು ಗೊತ್ತಿದ್ದರೆ, ತಿಳಿಸಿ.

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ಮದುವೆ invite ಕಳಸದ ಭೂಪ candy crush invite ಕಳಸದ್ನಂತೆ!

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ಜೀವನದಲ್ಲಿ ಪ್ರತಿದಿನವೂ ಹೋರಾಟವೆ. ಯಾಕೆ?
ಏಳು ದಿನಗಳ ಹೆಸರು ನೋಡಿ:
ಭಾನುwar
ಸೋಮwar
ಮಂಗಳwar
ಬುಧwar
ಗುರುwar
ಶುಕ್ರwar
ಶನಿwar

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This ad brought tears in my eyes! Jealous of the team who made it.
Hats off team O&M!

Credits:
Client: Adani Wilmar
Creative Agency: Ogilvy & Mather
Creative Chairman: Piyush Pandey
COO: Angshu Malik
Group Creative Director: Sukesh Nayak
Production House: Curious Films
Director: Vivek Kakad
Producer: Shahzad Bhagwagar

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4O5Q4Z87epo

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ನಿಮ್ಮ ಮನಸ್ಸನ್ನು ಪ್ರಶಾಂತವಾಗಿ ಸಮಾಧಾನ ಸ್ಥಿತಿಯಲ್ಲಿ ಇಟ್ಟ್ಕೋಬೇಕೇ? ಕಾಟನ್ಪೇಟೆ ರಸ್ತೆಲಿ ಬಲಗೈಯಲ್ಲಿ ದಮ್ಮು ಮತ್ತು ಎಡಗೈಯ್ಯಲ್ಲಿ ಚಾ ಲೋಟ ಹಿಡ್ಕೊಂದು ಬುರ್ರ್ ಅಂತ ಮೈ ಮೇಲೇ ಬರೋ ವೋಲ್ವೋ ಬಸ್ಸು ಒಂದಡಿ ದೂರ ಇದ್ರೂ ಕ್ರಾಸ್ ಮಾಡೋ ಯಾರನ್ನಾದರೂ ಕೇಳಿ…ಆ ಸಮಾಧಿ ಸ್ಥಿತಿ ಹೇಗೆ ಬಂತೂ ಅವರಿಗೆ ಅಂತ…!

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ಜರ್ಮನಿಗೆ ಪಾರ್ಟಿ ಈಗ ಶುರು. ಮುಗಿಸೋ ಅರ್ಜೆಂಟ್-ಇನ್ನ ಏನಿಲ್ಲ!

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TEN!
Number of father-son pairs to play Tests for India, including Stuart Binny today, and his father Roger.
Like father…like son!

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Random Jottings on Facebook – 3

Random Jottings on Facebook – 2

Random Jottings on Facebook – 1

Remember the ‘Aluminium Box’ that was used to carry school books?

May 29, 2014

rwb-aluminiumbox290514

‘Skool Shtudent’ Lingo

June 14, 2013

rwb_studnetlingo_140613

Compilation & Design: Ramakrishna Bellur

 

Shoshal, Max, Ombark… every generation, every school, every class has some students who pronounce it this way! Feel free to add to the list!

Schools to go Digital

June 21, 2012

 Schools set to take a digital leap : The Times of India

Cartoon: RK

Also visit the Cartoon page on RwB.

The Art of Reusing

March 17, 2012

Some of the below mentioned activities are advisable for children, some are not, while some are fine with parental guidance.

It’s time for more nostalgia on RwB. Wherever you see or read today, the one word that hits you is REUSE and RECYCLE! Just remembered a few things that we used to reuse as kids. So here goes:

Empty Cigar packs : This was between 1st standard till 3rd standard. Me and my friends dutifully hunted for used cigar packs on the footpaths, roads and near any petty shops. As soon as we got a few, we threw away the torn or soiled ones, while the OK looking ones were wiped and taken into the ‘secret production chamber’, that no parent knew where it existed! The packs were carefully made into a walkie talkie phone, which when you held in your right palm (between the index and thumb fingers facing you), would open up. The main tools used were a strong rubberband and a ball point pen (blue and red) to customise the phone to your requirements!

Any cousin or relative to visit the home would be shown the proud possession! And when they asked to give our phone for them to hold, we wouldn’t let them touch it,and we would run away to our production chamber to make some changes, lest our enemies duplicates the hi-tech phone!

***

Cycle tyres : Around the same time, it was a pastime to play with thin cycle tyres (Some boys would have small and plumpy scooter tyres, which made a ‘tob-tob- noise when you hit them). Cycle tyres were quite easy to get, as the nearby cycle shop owner would happily get rid of unwanted tyres. When Amma used to send us to buy a soap or when we suddenly found a 25 paise (on the window sill, with which we bought a Double Bubble Gum), we would hit the tyre along side (either with our palms or with a smooth chota stick), and as we turned so would the tyre, which obeyed us only when we had that small stick). As we stood at the shop, we would hang it on to our right shoulder, and would be back home in a jiffy if the house was down the road! Where most of today’s cars are parked on the roads would be our rightful lane to play the Tyre aata!

***

Magnets and Ball bearings : When with the cycle tyres, I remember collecting a box full of ball bearings (again this came free and easy, as there would be plenty of them lying in and around the cycle shop, some visible, some hidden in the dark soil, some shining, some black and out of shape…)

There was nothing as fascinating as seeing the ball bearings stick on to each other (similar to 3-4 people holding on to each other on a cliff, one holding the other’s leg) when a Magnet made its presence. The ball bearings would wobble when the magnet moved near it. Magnets would suddenly be in so much demand, that the round badge like things that Amma had purchased from 8th cross Rayara Gudi, and pasted on the metal window frame in the kitchen (or later the refrigerator) on which were Krishna, Rama, Raghavendraswamy, Lakshmi, Ganesha, Saraswathi etc. etc. would all be left to pile up on each other in the shelf as the magnet behind them would have been robbed!

***

Coloured Glass pieces : This was a very short lived hobby. Maybe during 2nd standard till beginning of 3rd standard. When we used to play Mann-aata, we would suddenly get dark brown glass pieces, while digging. While walking to the bus stand with Amma, I would chance upon a yellow shining glass piece. I used to collect these and watch the world through them. Such a surreal feeling!

***

Film Reel : Lengthy film reels would be thrown on roads, which we would collect and try to see if we could see the characters moving when we moved them really quickly. Negligible movement! Unless I found a reel with Rajkumar in it, I would not bring these into the secret production chamber. And I never found a reel with Rajkumar in it!

***

Scud Missile : These were clearly during the Gulf war, when I was in 9th standard. All that was required to make the scud missile was a small wooden plank (as big as your palm), 3 small nails, a rubberband and some matchsticks. The 3 nails would be partially hit on the plank to make a triangle. Two nails would be wound by a rubberband. A matchstick would now be placed, ready to be shot. When one of the nails having the rubberband around it would become hot (due to the heat transferred by another matchstick), the scud matchstick would fly into the air, to the enemy’s camp!

***

Hand made Cork ball : When in 4th standard, me and my friends spent considerable time in the summer trying to make our own cork ball. For this, we would go in search of Gobli mara / Rain tree (Acacia).

Once we collected lots of pods from the tree, we would then climb on to the parapet of my friend’s house to crush the pods (Why there? Who knows!). We would suddenly realise that Oil was missing –  so we would ask our friend Umesh to get some oil really quickly – he would sometimes get cooking oil, sometimes coconut oil. Now the grinding would start until it became a fine paste with a smooth texture. We would then make a ball, pouring oil on our hands and rolling the stuff in our hands in a circular motion. Then, it was the turn to keep the ball for drying on top of our house for a week.

After the exercise, we would wash our hands usually with 501 bar soap (used for washing clothes). However long we washed, the smell of the pods would stay for atleast for a day!

***

Grandpa’s Walking stick : Every house would have a walking stick -either Thatha’s, or your father’s Kashi Yatre stick, which would suddenly be more important than the cricket bat… because the stick would turn into a hockey stick overnight!

***

Magnifying glass : Commonly called Lens, we would keep it in our small pockets, take it to school, not to use it for what it is actually meant for, but to burn paper or dry leaves during Lunch break (January till March.) I think this was during 5th standard.

***

Matchbox : Collecting and sharing different matchbox covers was a hobby between 1st standard and 4th standard. But by 6th standard, only men of steel would learn the trick of using the ‘striking surface’ in various ways. Firstly, we would cut the piece and paste it onto the shoe heel. A match would always be hidden, unknown to the opponent. During a face off, the stick would appear out of no where and be rubbed on to the shoe… the lit matchstick would be put off by blowing it in a very stylish way, with the eyes seeing the opponent and only the lower lip moveing (as close to what we had seen our hero doing in films!)

[Got caught doing this during SUPW class... made to paint 15 more chairs than others as a punishment]

Another use of the matchbox was to put small insects into it and release them in school / classroom!

***

Peppermint cover : This was one of the earliest tricks that humans learnt. After the chocolate / peppermint is totally chewed and swallowed, the cover would be pulled tightly by both hands and held close to the lips and blown. Beginners would get a ‘tussss’ sound, First graders would get a screeching noise while the Experts would be playing with the whistling sound!

***

Broom stick : Ramayana made us desperate for bow and arrow. The lucky ones would get a nice and strong stick of an unknown tree which would act as a bow while we (cursed souls) would have to be happy turning a broom stick into a bow and another broomstick for an arrow. Highly dangerous… we never managed to cause any accidents, but always heard someone tell us that some one in Rajajinagar/ Yeshwanthpura / Subramanyanagara lost an eye… we never believed it…but still we were scared of hurting each other!

***

Edges of the footpath towards the road : This was where we sat after playing cricket, and drank ‘Chombugattle’ water!. We would discuss about the game, rag, tease, eat bubble gum… While playing, if the match was ‘single side fielding’, then the batting side would sit usually on a compound wall behind the batsman (Usually there is one everywhere!).

***

Empty Bottles : These were used mainly during Deepavali, to light Rockets. In our days, we used to send some horizontally on the roads, what with such less vehicles.

***

X-Ray sheets : To watch the sun during Grahana, we would hunt for Ajji’s Xray sheet (that she had been given after her recent visit to Jayadeva Hospital near City Market). Once we started asking for the Xray sheet, Ajji would think it was being asked to discuss about her health, and she would quickly and obediently give it, taking it out from the bottom-most part of the ‘kabbinada pettige’, only to be later told that her Xray has become a toy for the young brutes!

***

Newspapers : Some of us would use newspapers for various things – to bind books, to make kites, hit flies, light the kerosene stove / hande-vole-uri, as a chart sheet to make collage, to fold and keep a piece of the newspaper under the shaking part of the Godrej bureau / shelf / almirah…

***

Soap cover : After taking out the new soap bar, the cover would be opened and kept under the clothes, for a few days, so that the aroma spread across the clothes.

***

Dairy Milk Foil : The aluminum foil one found in a Cadbury Dairy Milk, would be neatly kept in a school notebook, after rubbing out any crease on the foil! The metallic sound it made every time we held it was music to my ears. Even today, when I eat a Dairy Milk (which is the BEST chocolate in the world), I cannot forget how many foils I must have preserved in my childhood!

***

Bangalore Press Calendar : “The empty space behind the Bangalore Press calendar was where we wrote and practiced our tables, handwriting…” father used to tell this. For me, any empty space is worthy only to be drawn. And draw was what I did behind the calendar sheets! (Good, there was no back to back printing then!)

***

Old socks : This was after we came back from school, and without removing the school uniform. 6th and 7th standard. The tennis, rubber, cork or leather ball we had would be put into the socks and tied to a high beam / grill. Kept hitting the ball with SG bat to get the perfect shot, feet movement and posture!

***

Used Dalda / Farex Tins :  Rangoli powder in my house, neighbour’s house, or any one’s house would all be kept in either Dalda or Farex tin only! And these tins with Rangoli would be stolen to put the crease on our pitches i.e. my house compound!

***

Cleaning the comb: Bottom portion of any used Agarbathi would be used to clean the comb. Later on, used and dead toothbrushes would be used to clean the comb. Another typical sight was seeing my opposite house Ajji using a matchstick to clean her ears.

***

Old Ball point pen: We would love to fix the small pencils to the bottom portion of the ball point pen and write our home work faster than normal. Got a kick out of this simple act!

***

Winding the Pencil : We would twist and wind the pencil box using a rubberband and a long pencil. When left alone, the pencil would rotate, thus making us feel our pencil box is a helicopter! 3rd standard project.

Another activity was piercing the eraser with the pencil and hitting the table or the friend unecessarily, with our new tool! 1st standard assignment.

***

Eraser / Rubber as a seal : We would write our initials in reverse on the ‘rubber’ and print it on our text book /note book, hands, thighs, sometimes crazily on our forehead…. thus sealing our fate literally! 2nd standard.

***

Exam pad : Invariably, every boy’s exam pad (brown color with metallic clip) would be broken in at least one corner. That was because it would be used as a cricket bat after the exam!

***

Cardboard in the Agarbathi pack: would be used to as a make-believe telescope…which would be used on a hot summer afternoon as we stood in the middle of the road to see if the Joy ice cream gaadi is coming or not! Seeing through it, we always believed ‘objects looked closer than they appeared otherwise’.

***

Blade and Compass : To make carvings on school furniture (Some of my teachers follow this blog…so no more details)

***

Tamarind seed : We would have this in our pockets anytime of the day. We would rub it on the wall or the ground and keep it immediately on the cheeks or necks of those who would annoy us.

***

Notebook Cover : The hardbound covers of our previous year’s notebooks Lekhak, later Vidya Lekhak, would have the pages torn out, and the hard cover would be used as a table tennis bat.

This post has become much much longer than what I actually thought initially. If you’ve read it fully , thanks for getting till here. Hope you have enjoyed this post. Let me know even otherwise.

Blog Cartoon – 17

September 5, 2007

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Cartoon: RK

Happy Teacher’s Day!

Also visit the Cartoon page on RwB.

Teacher’s Day Special:

Word Building with ‘WEBLOG’

August 31, 2007

One of the earliest games I learnt in school was word-building. Vimala Miss, my teacher at Hymamshu Jyothi Kala Peetha, told the game helped in improving our vocabulary. She used to play the game with us most of the days before the last period got over. And every time, we started, she used to tell: “Children, this game is ideal for holidays or as a diversion on class trips. Come on, Krishnan, start…”

On my way to office today morning, I was dissecting the word WEBLOG, trying to build a few words out of it. And I thought this could make a good activity out here.

So folks, how many words (2 letters and above) can you build out of the word ‘WEBLOG’? Perhaps 20!…or 40…or more?! Time limit: 30 mins.

Your time starts NOW. Happy word building.

Update: ANSWERS in the Comments section.

Teacher’s Dialogues and Mannerisms

May 23, 2007

I am sure we all remember a certain peculiarity relating to our teachers: The way they talked, they dressed, they scolded…

There was Nagamani Miss in Hymamshu Jyothi Kala Peetha who used to say, “Bad boy, what made you do such a thing?”. She used to start every sentence with ‘Henceforth’ (Eg: Henceforth, no delay in submitting the Home-Work). And end each sentence with ‘I say’ (Eg: Stand up I say).

In KV Malleswaram, there was one Mrs. Noor Fathima (History) who would enter the class and tell: Yesssss, open your bookssss (in a peculiar tune).

Then there was the SUPW teacher (forgot her name) who would tell: “Stond in line.”

Shivanna Sir (PT) was the ultimate when it came to voice modulation when scolding. We could also see the expression change on his face. The voice would start from low to high and higher range: le, LE, RASCAL, PLAY WITH A STRAIGHT BAT, USELESS FELLOW!

We had Udupa Sir who would lift his hand to slap even before hearing the full complaint. Then there was Anasuya Miss (HM) who would always walk with a scale in hand. In the morning it would be a full scale. By noon, it would be broken (a poor chap being the target).

Sanskrit teacher Suryanarayana would pinch the ear of the ‘victim’ and ask him seeing the whole class (particularly girls) in Sanskrit: Tava naama kim? UTTHISHTA! (He used the word ‘mandam mandam’ a lot and was nicknamed the same).

When we saw our Hindi teacher Malathi Prakash, we never felt Hitler was dead. She simply thrashed the boys and girls alike. And as for her English, here’s an example. Listening to the Radio (Cricket commentary in particular) was my obsession then. In her class, I got caught one day and she barked thus: Ramkishan, Badmaash ladke, I will throw the class out of you!

When we were in the Library, Padma Miss would say: Aye: Can you not read Silently? She would point to 2-3 fellows and say: Stand out. Hmmm… go! 

During the NCC theory classes, I remember the way the NCC Officers from Air force stations would shout at us early in the morning after the march past: Bloody fellows, I will take the juice out of you! (we never understood then what he meant)

If that was with their speaking and scolding style, the way some of the teachers dressed amused us too. In HJKP, Vimala Miss always had a top knot and lots of powder on her face. There was another teacher in HJKP, ‘B’ section. Always ‘Haralenne face’ (Castor Oil face).

In KVM, there was Iyer sir (Physics). His sense of matching was aweful. (Many a days, it was Parrot Green shirt with Red pant.) There was Ravikumaran Nair who whould wear the same pant and shirt for three days continously. Noor Fathima would come immaculately dressed with everything matching everything. Deena Ram Singh would just look as if she is straight out of a lipstick factory. Ditto Padmavathy Miss. It would always be a silk or synthetic Jubba over a formal pant for Art sir HL Bhat. Venkatalakshmi miss (SVL) would always cover her neck with the ‘seragu’ (pallu) a la MS Subbulakshmi.

How can I forget the attire of our Principal T Prabhakar? Never did I see him wear anything other than Suit and Boot!

Just remembered all this yesterday evening as I was seeing some old school photos.

Inviting readers to share their ‘favourite’ teacher’s dialogues and mannerisms. Surely, it would be great fun reading it!

My days at Hymamshu Jyothi Kala Peetha

May 16, 2007

Recently, I visited Hymamshu Jyothi Kala Peetha (formerly Hymamshu Shishu Vihara) between April 1-22 to attend the Sampoorna Ramayana lectures by Sri KS Narayanacharya. I saw a tremendous change in the building although there were hints of the past. Sitting in the auditorium, nostalgic memories came to me of the place where I studied from Kindergarten to Second Standard (and a few days of Third Standard). When I studied, we used to have prayer sessions and lunch in this auditorium.

Sharing some HJKP (that’s what we wrote on the book labels) memories with you all:

Kindergarten to 2nd standard

  • Cried when I went to school on the first day of Kindergarten class. It seems my sister stood near the gate and watched my plight with glee!
  • My friend (who stayed a few houses down the road) came to the same school but for Montessori class. Heard his mother telling my sister that he does not have any homework. I overheard it and have ever since wanted to study in Montessori class. (Even today I have this desire to sit in a Montessori class.)
  • Would wait to play in the sand and a huge cement pipe (would sit in it with some friends and chat what game to play).
  • I had a pony-tail till I was in U-KG. Sometime in the middle of the academic year, I had my first hair cut. And when I went to school the next day with a crop cut, friends and teachers failed to recognise yours truly!
  • My mother or sister would get me pencil and rubber from a nearby ‘Devi Stores’ every week. The shopkeeper’s face is still etched in my memory (He had Chandana on his forehead everytime I saw him – morning or noon.) I always wanted red-black striped Nataraj pencil and green coloured ink rubber. Hated those scent rubbers (which dirtied the page). Occasionally, I would get a notebook with boxes (for Maths) and double lined book for Kannada.
  • There was ‘Ashwattha Vriksha’ in my school. During a particular month (must have been Dhanurmasa), my mother and a few of my friend’s mothers would go around it after dropping us to our classes.
  • When I was in First Standard, I had taken part in a fancy dress competition (dressed as Netaji). I still have the snap that my friend’s mom gave me.
  • Again, when I was in First Standard, there was a total solar eclipse and my father picked me up midway during school hours so that I could have food before ‘Grahana’ started. And I loved coming home earlier than my classmates!
  • There was this guy called Jagadhish who suddenly slept on the floor one afternoon because his nose was bleeding. Thanks to him, there was no teaching the whole of afternoon. An Ayah was summoned and a wet hanky was placed on Jaggu’s nose. Some of us sat next to him thinking those were Jaggu’s last moments.
  • When I was in Second Standard, had a black and white version of Kannada text book (Ravi Hodhanu; Ajjana Mane; Onake Obavva; Swatantrya Dinacharane…nenapidya?) After a few months, one day some classmate showed that she had a coloured version of the same. I pestered my parents to get me the coloured text book. They kept telling it was not available at VR Book Sellers or that they would get me one when they went towards Malleswaram Circle or when they went to watch ‘Bhakta Prahlada’ (VR Book Sellers was very close to Geethanjali where the film was playing). I waited till December and one fine day coloured the whole Kannada text book in and out. I showed it to my classmates and boasted that in their textbooks, only pictures had colour while mine had the full page in colour!
  • In both First and Second Standards, our class teacher was Vimala Miss. She was very friendly and hardly scolded any of us. And she was the first lady that I saw with a ‘top-knot’.
  • Krishnan and Mangala were the class leaders. Vimala Miss would always ask these two to show their home-works to the whole class. And these two were the darling of the masses.
  • In Second Standard, some of us had acted in a play ‘Tenali Ramakrishna’ where Krishnan played the title role and Mangala was goddess Kali. I acted as a minister in Krishnadevaraya’s court. (And my dialogue was ‘Bahuparakh, Bahuparakh’ at the start of the play and at the end of the play: Yes, your majesty. And these were chorus dialogues where a few of us shouted these words in unison).
  • There was a student in my class (unable to recall her name) whose mother (Shyamantakamani Miss) was a teacher in our school. Whenever there was a few minutes left for the final bell, a teacher would ask: Who would like to tell a story? There would be a lot of noise in the class. Finally, this girl would be called by the teacher. And everytime she would come and announce: Today I will tell ‘The never-ending story’ and start: Once upon a time, in a far off country, there lived a farmer with his two cows, a dog…BELL rings and we all runaway. This was a regular feature.
  • Some of my friends (seniors) used to take a short cut through a gully next to Santhosh Baby Care Centre (now called Shishu Santhosh). I accompanied them just once and loved jumping in to the backyard of someone’s house and entering the school in a jiffy!
  • For picnic, we had been to Cubbon Park in our Second Standard. We all sat in the Toy train, had cup cakes, chips, biscuits and Joy Ice cream. While coming back from the picnic, saw for the first time the Violin shaped building (Chowdaiah Hall) from the bus and was thrilled that such a building existed!
  • One afternoon, the class teacher told us that there would be a medical checkup. When the doctor saw my weight, he told I needed to eat eggs. I thought for the rest of my life, I would be eating only eggs. When I came home and announced what the doctor told, I got chastised by all elders.
  • In Second Standard, the whole class walked till Malleswaram Sri Rama Mandira to watch a magic show. The whole hall was full with students from various schools. I remember seeing a ball travel from one box to another just as the magician waved his hand. And he selected my classmate Krishnamurthy (because he was wearing a red cap) for one particular trick. Krishnamurthy sat in a gunny bag and the magician told ‘Abracadabra’ and Krishnamurthy vanished in a second. But the magician had Krishnamurthy’s red cap in his hand. Some of us, out of anxiety, shouted “Krishnamurthy! Krishnamurthy!” only to be told by the teacher to sit silently.
  • My teacher told me that she had selected me and a few others to compete in Camlin Colour Contest to be held at Glass House one Sunday. An evening before the contest, my second elder sister (who draws really well) showed me how and what to draw. She drew a swan, a river, mountains, sun, trees… and made me draw likewise. After the training, my eldest sister (who is so-so in drawing) came and drew a small ‘r’ and told me: That’s how you draw a flying bird!
  • And courtesy Camlin, it was in this training that I painted a picture (until then it was only colour pencils, crayons and sketch pens). I felt so proud to have a palette, paintbrush, a small cloth, drawing board, water in a small tumbler, pins and getting all the attention…
  • I remember doing ‘combined study’ with the same ‘Magic boy’ Krishnamurthy in my second standard. He stayed in Malleswaram 19th cross (BWSSB Quarters) while I stayed (still do) three roads behind. We had Maths exam on the first day. But we wanted to prepare ourselves for the holidays. Me and Krishnamurthy must have atleast ran a minimum ten times from my house to his that afternoon on some silly pretext (tennis ball yaav brand; bat grip change maadbeku; powdering the carrom board, check the volume number of Amar Chitra Katha’s ‘Bheema and Hanuman’…)
  • And of the few days in Third Standard, I clearly remember Vimala Miss coming to our class on the first day of school and telling: “Children from now on, you need to take down whatever is written on the board in that particular period itself. You need to be quick and you must not waste time in sharpening the pencils during the class. I want your nails to be cut every fortnight. From this class onwards, you will wear uniform from Monday to Friday. Saturday will be white dress. You are all big boys and girls now. Everyone must get Handkerchief. No fighting in class. I expect discipline from all of you. I will see you in the afternoon.” And we all stood up and said, ” Thank you miss”.

I studied Third Standard in 4 schools. A few days into the class, my father got transferred to Kerala. So from HJKP, I went to Anglo Indian Public School in Ernakulam. It was a Malayalam medium school but teachers used to pinch students badly (I lost my skin many times) for not doing home work and stuff. Since I took time to pick up the local tongue, my arms were full of pinch marks. Just as I picked up Malayalam, my father got me admitted to Kendriya Vidyalaya Naval Base, Cochin. And just before the final exams, my mother’s health deteriorated and we were forced to come back to Bangalore and I joined Kendriya Vidyalaya Malleswaram, where I studied till Plus Two. Glorious years!

Don’t miss:

Photos from Sri KS Narayanacharya’s discourse at Hymamshu Jyothi Kala Peetha

May 8, 2007

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From Top: Sri Narayanacharya with ‘Mysore Petha'; During the lecture; Srimathi and Sri Narayanacharya; Section of the audience (Photos: RK)

As most of you know, me and my Mother-in-law (and thousands of other devotees) attended the ‘Sampoorna Ramayana’ discourse conducted by Sougandhika, Cultural wing of Hymamshu Jyothi Kala Peetha, Malleswaram. Throughout the 22 days of the lectures on Ramayana by none other than the scholar known as Ramayanacharya, Sri KS Narayancharya, all of us were completely immersed in the great epic.

One particular day of the discourse, we saw a pigeon come and sit on the huge photo frame of lord Sri Rama for the full 2 hours. Best thing was, it didn’t mess up the offerings (hoovu, hannu) on the stage. Maybe Anjaneya himself came in that form to listen to his lord’s story!

I am really thankful to Sri Rama for giving all those who attended the lectures the opportunity to listen to the insightful and enlightening talk by Sri KS Narayanacharya. I am thirsty to listen to more such lectures ever since they concluded on April 22nd, 2007.

Sharing a few photographs taken on the concluding day of the discourse with all my dear readers.

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