Blog Cartoon – 61

Cartoon: RK

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Blog Cartoon – 58

Cartoon: RK

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Blog Cartoon – 49

Cartoon: RK

Also visit the Cartoon page on RwB.

Is love really blind?

Design: RK

Scene 1:
Seventh decade of the 20th century- A young boy and a girl see each other at a function, fall in love, and their marriage is arranged by the elders. They lead a comfortable life, with two kids etc. etc.

Boy and girl are from the same caste. (Point to be noted)

Scene 2:
First decade of the millennium – A young boy and a girl see each other at the workplace, fall in love. And…

The girl’s parents make a lot of noise, and the poor thing says she will either marry the guy or remain unmarried for life. That is when her parents go to an elderly person and he says that “if married, the girl will repent for life”. So the girl sacrifices her love.

Boy and girl are from different castes. (Point to be noted)

Scene 3:
First decade of the millennium – A young boy and a girl see each other in a friend’s house and fall in love. The girl is hesitant to say it to her orthodox and traditional parents (whose marriage was arranged in the seventh decade of the 20th century). But surprisingly, once they come to know of it, they agree to the marriage.

Boy and girl are from different castes. (Point to be noted)

Irony is that, the parents in Scene 2, are the hero and heroine of Scene 1.

Now, to ask the obvious: Is love really blind? Does caste really matter?

Waiting to read what you feel.

People who drain our energy

by Latha Vidyaranya 

We often come across people after speaking to whom we feel so drained of our energy! Perhaps we can call them ‘energy-vampires’! They keep talking to us endlessly about themselves and their woes and constantly complaining on somebody or something that they seldom allow us to talk in between and make a contribution to the talk. It becomes a monologue rather than a dialogue. In spite of getting bored and irritated with such people, we continue to give them our precious time thinking that we are in some way obliged to listen to them. S/he may be our friend, our sibling or our own parent, especially mothers, who go on talking about their past difficulties or their present poor relationship with another child or in-law or about anything else that least interests us. But we simply surrender to them and continue to give them our time.
 
STOP! We are in no way obliged to listen to them always! It is fine to give our ear to somebody who may badly want to share his/her difficulty to lighten their emotional burden. We are doing a good job by helping them to relieve themselves of some life problem that they had been suppressing all these days. In fact at the end of the session they feel so grateful to us that we were patient enough to listen to their woes and perhaps even gave a few valuable suggestions to overcome those troubles. It is perfectly laudable.

But not so laudable is lending our time to listen to the same old stories of our own kith and kin day in and day out! We have every right to withdraw ourselves from such people because we are ending up as victims ourselves! This surely is an abuse on our time! Please understand that as adults we all have our own priorities set and we need time and energy to reach these goals. We can not let someone eat up all our time and constantly weep on our shoulders. We have an obligation to help them realize that it can not go on and on and that we will not be available to them henceforth to discuss things that may not have any solutions and that we are all obliged to cope with certain of these difficulties that have no visible end. In fact we are doing a disservice to them by developing a kind of dependency in them upon us.

Once this is stated matter-of-factly the ‘energy-vampire’ realizes that each one of us adults is responsible for our own upliftment or digging our own graves! We all have to draw energy from our own inner resources and help ourselves out of difficulties or learn some coping strategies. They need to very clearly see that their continuous outpours everyday with us is creating distances in our own relationship with other family members. Others (our spouse, our kids) have an equal right to demand our time, all of which is currently being drained by this particular person. You can not let other relationships get damaged because of your misplaced priorities on this person’s woes. Please wake up now and keep people at right distances and allow yourself the precious time and space that is very much required for your own growth.

Latha Vidyaranya’s articles featured on RwB:

• Learning Disability in children
• Fathers also need to balance home and work
• Postpartum Depression
• Celebrating Differences in Life
• Synesthetics can see smells, hear pictures, and smell colours and numbers
• Parenting

(Latha Vidyaranya is a Special Educator and Counsellor and has founded ‘Empower Counselling Centre’ in Malleswaram, Bangalore.)

Learning Disability in children

by Latha Vidyaranya
 
I come across so many school children who experience learning difficulties that require special remedial teaching. These children find it very difficult to cope with the school lessons in some or all the subjects. It is equally difficult for the subject teachers to give individual attention to the children in a class of 50 to 60 children. Thus, such children lag way behind others in academics and become target of blame, insult and punishment both at school and home. They are branded as lazy, dumb, good-for-nothing etc. These children are routinely sent to tuition classes in their neighbourhood and hardly make any progress as the regular tuition teacher is unable to focus on the special problem areas of these children like reading, writing, spelling, retaining memory, language comprehension and arithmetic. There are many resource centres to cater to the learning needs of these children.
 
Children who may lag behind in studies due to mental retardation, emotional problems or other physical disabilities like hearing or visual impairment do not fall under the category of learning disabled (LD). Children with LD have average or above average levels of intellectual capacity and they may be smart in other aspects like orally giving out the answers, but unable to write these answers. Also, they may be good in language and poor in numerical skills or vice versa or may be poor in both language and arithmetic.
 
Minimal brain dysfunction is the cause for this learning disorder which is coming to light through the latest brain mapping techniques. Academic learning requires perceiving things through visual mode, auditory mode, kinesthetic mode (hands-on-activities) and storing them systematically in memory areas and retrieving them when such information is required. Any problem in these circuits can pose as learning difficulties. Training them through special teaching techniques can help children improve their learning capabilities.
 
The symptoms usually shown by these children are reversal or mirror imaging of letters while writing d for b, or p for q, reversal of letters in a word, like god for dog, no for on, was for saw, reversal of syllables in a word, like aminal for animal, reversal of numbers, like 23 for 32, 456 for 654, reading errors like skipping words, skipping lines, losing place while reading, poor comprehension of read material, writing problems like poor handwriting, poor spacing between words or between lines, number of spelling errors, bizarre spellings etc. Reversal of letters is seen during this developmental phase but soon overcome by the age of 8 years. If these problems persist they may be indicators of a serious learning difficulty.
 
It is very important for the school teachers and parents to understand the concept of “Learning Disability” and refer them to special educators or educational counsellors for a psycho-educational assessment and remedial guidance, which will help the children to overcome many of their learning problems. Earlier the identification of the problem earlier would be the intervention and better would be the outcome. Left unnoticed and unattended, it can lead to serious emotional and behavioural problems in children.

Latha Vidyaranya’s other articles on RwB:

• Fathers also need to balance home and work
• Postpartum Depression
• Celebrating Differences in Life
• Synesthetics can see smells, hear pictures, and smell colours and numbers
• Parenting

(Latha Vidyaranya is a Special Educator and Counsellor and has founded ‘Empower Counselling Centre’ in Malleswaram, Bangalore.)

Blog Cartoon – 23

Cartoon: RK

Wish you all a very Happy Gowri-Ganesha festival (September 14 and 15).

Also visit the Cartoon page on RwB.

Parenting

by Latha Vidyaranya

Congrats, RK, for that lovely article on the pleasures of fathering a young kid! It is very rare in these days of hectic work schedules that I hear a parent speaking in such exultation about the little achievements of the kid or the happy quiet moments of togetherness with the kid! Narayan is truly blessed!

I agree that parenting is the toughest job on earth. It seldom gets its due share of acknowledgement, and generally goes unsung. It is the most difficult job, where you get hands-on training on the spot, on the real platform always! No prior rehearsals are possible and no ‘undo’ or ‘delete’ options are available if the errors are committed. Though there are thousands of parenting manuals available in the market, all suggestions given are at the most guidelines only and not the absolute truths. That is because no two kids or two parents or two families are similar. Each one is unique with their own amusing characteristics that one man’s Visha (poison) can become another’s Amrutha (nectar) in this matter.

And don’t we all agree that we start realizing and appreciating our parents’ efforts only when we become a parent ourselves!?

And how soon the birds are ready to fly out of the nest! And then starts our lamentation of how I could have spent that time with my kid and how I should not have done this or that and how I could be a totally different parent if only I am given one more chance now to parent my little kid all over again! 

So all you young parents, come on, slow down with your other “more important businesses of life”, grab this chance of spending good time with your kids helping him or her to evolve into a beautiful human being tomorrow. Be there for him or her when he or she needs you the most. If not physically possible, at least be there ALWAYS with your kid EMOTIONALLY. Say it in words how much you love him/her, say that you always trust and respect his/her views, you are always there for them both in their achievements and more importantly in their failures too! 

I am reminded of a child’s words to its parents:

“Papa and Mama, Love me most when I deserve it the least for it is then that I need it most”.

(Latha Vidyaranya is a Special Educator and Counsellor and has founded ‘Empower Counselling Centre’ in Malleswaram, Bangalore.)

15 August, 2007 was a lovely day

Cartoon: RK 

(The guy is telling to his friend: I see ‘60′ all over the town)

The fantastic sunrise woke me up to a wonderful morning. I could not wait to read the special editions* of all my favourite newspapers at home. After scanning a few pages, I went to the nearby newspaper shop and bought a copy of some other newspapers. On my way home, bought a packet of milk and excitedly sat in the balcony to read the special articles. I had just finished reading the article by Manmohan Singh and Amartya Sen in The Hindu when my son woke up. After the morning duties, my wife dressed him up and fed him breakfast. He is used to seeing me with a couple of newspapers everyday. But today he saw me flooded with papers all over. I showed him a few pictures of our national flag. And that was when I got the idea of taking him to my school (KV Malleswaram) to show him some real flags and children celebrating Independence Day.

On the way, I showed him a few autos which had tied the flag to one side and had loud music playing inside. But he was concentrating more on the stray dog which was waiting to cross the street!

Entering the school, we saw an ocean of kids holding plastic flags while the hoisted one kept flying high. (I got vivid memories of the time when I was studying in this school and the many Independence Days that I took part in.) My son was really happy to see a boy playing drums on the stage for the song ‘Vishwa Vinuthana Vidya Chethana’. We saw a couple of other cultural programmes and went to the front portion of the school where we saw a fountain and an aquarium. My son loved those colourful fishes.

From there, we went to a park that my son visits every evening. The main reason why he loves going to the park, although there are swings, see-saws and slides, is because there is a cow shed opposite the park. And next to it, a railway track. On some days, he not only gets to see the cows, but also a train. Yesterday was one such day.

While he was playing in the park, there was an Indira Gandhi speech that was being played by a patriot Indian. She said: “Nearly half of India’s people have been born free and have no personal memory of the colonial days. We are engaged in building the nation, in giving political freedom its full economic and social content….”

More than my son, I was really having a wonderful time playing in the park. He kept humming a few songs and rhymes while playing. In between he asked me to sing his favourite songs. The sun kept beating down and I asked him if he wanted to play or go home. He told ‘Manege’ (home). As we left the park, I saw an old lady carrying a heavy load of vegetables on her head. And Indira’s words continued to be heard (and faded away): “We women have for years played a prominent role in the freedom struggle, in politics and in public life. We have women engineers, women governors, women ambassadors, women judges, women diplomats and administrators….”

And I heard the old lady shout, “Tarkari, Soppu”…

* Will take me a few days to finish reading yesterday’s newspapers.

***

RwB celebrates India at 60:

• India at Sixty by TS Srinivasa Murthy

• Tricolour Marble Cake and Eggless Tea Cake: Recipe by Bridget White Kumar

• Sare Jahan se Accha, Hindustan Hamara by BR Usha

• Rangoli-16 by Srilakshmi Suresh

• Independence Day by Cuckoo

• ‘India at 60′ collage

Cultivating a Hobby

by Ramaadevi Nagaraj

Everyday life is a usual routine for almost each and everyone, more so for the elderly, be it men or women. Their capacity for physical work would have naturally lessened to some extent; as such spending time would be a tedious effort. At this juncture having cultivated a hobby comes in very handy. Some nurture it in their youth, whereas others develop it in their later years.

A hobby keeps the mind in good spirits, each day is filled with a new kind of enthusiasm giving no room for stray thoughts.

The habit of reading is one of the best hobbies, it can be done anywhere, anytime and at any place, it imposes no restrictions whatsoever, and the only material needed is an interesting book and perhaps spectacles to read the printed matter clearly. The reading hobby when developed in childhood certainly goes a long way in helping to bide the time especially when no other options remain: while travelling, waiting in the airport, bus or train platform, an appointment with the doctor or just at home cuddled with a book when it’s raining cats and dogs.

Reading good books enhances one’s vocabulary and knowledge, and slowly but definitely it leads us to the spiritual side of existence which should be the ultimate goal of all human beings.

Initially what starts as a hobby may also become career oriented, it may be just a past time too, but it certainly acts as a soothing balm to the drudgery of our daily chores, and in the midst of our trials and tribulations.

Hobbies may be one or many like painting, drawing, photography to name a few. Indulging in these activities help us to focus our mind and derive joy from the perfection achieved in small tasks. A hobby helps as a crusader to pen our feelings and as said earlier a hobby is a must to take us through the evening of our lives.