Haste not wasted

November 9, 2006

It was six months since I had lost my mother. Although I am a steely character, losing Amma was tough. Around this time, unexpectedly I met a girl at a friend’s place. After initial introductions, we spoke as though we knew each other for ages. She came across to me as a pure-hearted person, not the usual kind of girl with heavy make-up or ‘hep’ dress. She was simple, honest and frank in her remarks. She had just finished her B.E. She was preparing for CAT.

After each passing day, I felt like spending more time with her. Ever since we met, we spoke everyday over phone. One day, in the fit of the moment, I proposed to her. It was hardly a month since we had met. She blankly refused my proposal and told that we could continue as friends. I felt I acted in haste. But we were still comfortable with each other’s friendship. After nine long months, I was taken aback when she asked, “Do you see me as your wife?”. I was both happy and nervous. She still had to do her MBA and I did not have a proper job. But we were loyal to each other and never gave up hopes.

Four years passed by. She finished her MBA with flying colors. And by then, I had got a job as a Graphic Designer.

But the question was breaking the news to our families. My sister and brother-in-law, and her brother stood for us. One Thursday, my family went to her house seeking her hand. Though I was sceptical of her parents agreeing to the proposal, I was still hopeful. And wonder of wonders! After meeting my sister and brother-in-law (I lost my parents early in life) and after enquiring about me, in a matter of minutes, the engagement function was over. And the wedding was over, believe it or not, within FOUR days.(We both waited for FOUR years for this day).

Even today me and my wife (we have a son now), happily married for 3 years, cannot forget the unexpected meeting that changed our lives forever. And I don’t regret having proposed to her hastily!


47 Responses to “Haste not wasted”

  1. prashanth Says:

    ತಾಳಿದವನು ಬಾಳಿಯಾನು 🙂
    ತಾಳಿದರೆ ತಾಳಿ ಕಟ್ಟುವ ಭಾಗ್ಯ 😉

  2. Ashish Says:

    Nice and sweet.
    Patience always pays.

  3. decemberstud Says:

    Ahhh RK….isn’t that the sweet love story we were looking for 😉

    Now that it’s 3 years, you sshould ask Madam to blog a list of your nuances and annoyances…LOL

    Good luck, and many many many many many more happy years together !!!

  4. travel plaza Says:

    Awww…what a sweet story. Wish you both the best always:)

  5. Gangadhar Says:

    that’s a sweet love story..And i always love love stories with a happy end.. 🙂
    Happy anniversary,both of you.. Wishing you many more happy anniversaries to come..

  6. praneshachar Says:

    haste adaru nivu bekaddannu paddediddiri. your wife’s decision was also quite knowledgable and perhaps a move afater a very careful analysis may be a MBA thinking good to know ultimately everything went well and finished in a flash
    may god give both of you all the best for which you have aspired may all your dreams turn into reality nimmge namma hadika abhinandenagalu devar rakshe mattu aashirwada nimma kutumabada mele sada irali

  7. namma nadu Says:

    Thats straight from the heart and very warm and touching. Like Gangadhar said, a love story with a happy ending. Thanks for sharing & i seriously think now you can actually become a story writer !! Cheers.

  8. Srik Says:

    oooooooh..Happy anniversary and wish you all the best. I wish Many more happy returns of the day for you 🙂

  9. rk Says:

    namma amma ee maathu bahala heloru. your comments reminded me of her. thanks.

    thanks. i too believe in that.

    thanks a lot for your wishes. will surely tell her your blog idea!

    thank you for your warm wishes.

    happy you liked the story. thanks for your wishes.

    nimma shubhashayagalige vandanegalu.

    namma nadu,
    glad you liked the piece. and thanks for those encouraging words. keep visiting.

    thanks a lot.

  10. usha Says:

    Namma story nenapaguthe.. 😀

    Happy anniversary to both of you and wish you all the best.

  11. christy Says:

    Hai RK,

    It was a nice and sweet article to read abt ur marriage, by the way y dont u post ur family photograph once.

    Good luck and many more happy years together.

  12. Gangadhar Says:

    It’s not that i’m only happy reading this,RK..It made me a sigh of relief,i should say..Me actually hurried to end of the story to see whether it’s an happy end or what..Thank god u both made it. 🙂

  13. Vijay Says:

    RK.. I did the same as Ganga… read the end ending first just to make sure….

    Happy Anniversary.. Mr. Romantic

  14. rk Says:

    howdha?! nimm kathe kelbeku bidveesaagi. thanks for your wishes.

    glad you found the post ‘sweet’. thanks for dropping by and for your wishes.

    haha….nice to hear that! even today, we remember GOD….i mean yes, GOD and also those “Good Old Days”!

    thank you sir! so both you and ganga pressed the >> Fast Fwd button is it? 😀 thanks once again for your wishes.

  15. Gangadhar Says:

    Me always wonder how u come up with those acronyms like GOD..! it’s amazing,RK..

  16. --Sunrise-- Says:

    “cannot forget the unexpected meeting that changed our lives forever” – *smile* a lovely post…

    Happy Anniversary!

  17. rk Says:

    GOD knows! 😉

    welcome to RwB. thanks for your warm wishes. you have a nice blog out there.
    best wishes.

  18. suparna Says:

    humhhh…makes me feel more hopeful , as im in the same boat now for last 3 years 🙂 Nice story …

  19. Lakshmi Says:

    So sweet. Nice to know your success. May god shower you both with all good in your life.

  20. rk Says:

    wish you good luck! thanks for dropping by.

    thanks for all your best wishes.

  21. Vani Says:

    Happy Anniversary, Bellur. Little late, though.

  22. Veena Shivanna Says:

    eee post Odid mele.. nim ginta hechchaagi vidhya mele gourava haavu santhosha uMTaaytu. She is a great lady who was too patient & was quite practical. avarige modlu nimman kaMdre ishTa ittu but parents saluvaagi beDa andro gottilla.. but that would be quite tough to say No even when you want to say Yes. I am not sure what should I say to this, may be she had a confidence in herself that she would need to understand herself more than that time & also she thought let me give bellur some time to find a better job… ask her this Q bellur & tell me….

    I was pretty impressed when you said that you gave her an option to work & you stayback home looking after Jr.RKN. Its not that you did something impossible, still very less people think in these lines. I know the practical problems a lady has to face in such situations…. I never know whether Love marriage works better or arranged marriage, I remember that email which spoke about OOPS(IT Junkie Jargon) & this two ways of marriage… But I appreciate the attitude one has to look through the good or bad with what ever they have…. Post was so timely… Wedding anniversary antha ellu bardilla aadre ella wish maadidaare so nanna wishes kooDa.
    November is a good month to get married is what I will say! 🙂

  23. rk Says:

    thanks. it’s never too late to wish!!

    thanks for all your wonderful words.

    1. patient & was quite practical: Yes, she was and is.

    2. modlu nimman kaMdre ishTa ittu but parents saluvaagi beDa andro gottilla: Absolutely true. She told me this long back.

    3. tough to say No even when you want to say Yes: Correct.

    4. may be she had a confidence in herself that she would need to understand herself: It seems she really thought and thought and only then did she tell me those golden words, “Do you see me as your wife?”.

    5. she thought let me give bellur some time to find a better job: she had actually told me to find a good job by the time she finished her MBA!

    my wife still thinks i was joking when i asked her to work while i took care of the kid! most people tend to equate Hindu marriage with arranged marriage. and i am happy to say i arranged my love marriage

    thanks for all your wishes. i guess your wedding ann. is in NOVEMBER…..right?

  24. praneshachar Says:

    fantastic ” I arranged my love marriage” it is luv cum arranged marriage with string of nolstalgia it will much more sweeter when you celebrate your silver jubilee wedding anniversary. wish many more laurels etc., etc.,
    nimage hrudaya purvaka abhinandanegalu
    veena nimma wedding anniversary novembernalliya?
    Yes I do agree Nov. is a good month to get married!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  25. Veena Shivanna Says:

    Inline comment bardideera ? Ha Ha Ha… Nice replies…
    Think , Think & then thunk nenpaaytu nimma thought thought noDi 🙂
    ‘Do you see me as your wife’ is a very decent way of proposing antha annistu, instead of all that usual stuff.. I couldn’t digest that word ‘My Lover’ in your CTR post really 🙂 Somehow I don’t use generally such words..
    We would be completing 4 years in another 2 weeks. My parents got married on May 25th & me Nov 25th… The coincindence was this one, all three children of my parents are born on 12th of various months(Aug, July, Dec repectively) the last one was 5 days late(May 17th). My dad’s 11th day ceremony was on Nov 12th… I was telling my mother yesterday that we will try to have my brother’s wedding on May 25th.. My friend’s dad also got married on this day, my parents were on their 34th year of their wedding!!!!!! Awesome annisutte…

  26. TSSM Says:

    Dear RK,

    Nice write up on your marriage.

    ” May your marriage prosper and see a thousand full moons”

  27. rk Says:

    thanks a ton for your wishes. veena has confirmed that her wedding is in November! nimmadu ide thingalu annisutte!? 😉

    glad you liked the reply.
    Advanced anniversary wishes from Bellur & family: Happy wedding anniversary, Veena & Prashanth!! (And i am the first to comment…errrr wish you!!!!)
    nice to know about 12th and 25th analogy!

    thank you sir!! sahasra chandra darshana!! wow!! thanks for those wonderful wishes.

  28. shark Says:

    That was a very sweet story 🙂
    May you have a very very happy married life for many more years to come 🙂

  29. Lakshmi Says:

    Belated Wedding Anniversary wishes to Bellur & Family. Btw, which date?
    Advance wishes to Veena & family.
    Praneshachar avare, nimmadunu Nov nalli wed. anniversary… naa?
    I also join this wagon – our anniversary is on 19th Nov!


  30. rk Says:

    thank you. 🙂

    thanks for those wishes. wish you also a very happy wedding anniversary!!

  31. Shruthi Says:

    Happy anniversary, Bellur!
    What a lovely story 🙂 May you have many more years of happiness and togetherness 🙂

  32. Veena Shivanna Says:

    Its so coinicental to have so many Nov-wedded people. Such rituals are conducted in some auspicious days allve ? Earlier wedding was generally conducted during that March to July kaala. offlate people consider kaarthika maasa to be good so is the reason too.
    Bellur, Can you write a post which has this maasa(astrology) & the technicality(scientifics) behind the beleifs. I had asked Srik for this one & looks like he is busy. Take his help if needed for the information part.

  33. rk Says:

    thanks for your warm wishes.

    did not know about this ‘march to july’ maduve season! nowadays, people are in such a hurry (specially the prospective grooms abroad) that even if it is a tuesday or an amavasye, the priest tells them to do a graha shanthi and the marriage is over.
    i will collect info on the topic (astrology & science) from various experts (including srik) and will post it in the near future. even i am interested in knowing more about the topic. thanks for your suggestion.

  34. praneshachar Says:

    howdu nov.25th
    lakshmi & veena
    nimage advance anniversary wishes wish you tons and tons
    happiness may almighty shower all what you need all the best
    veena special for you what a coincidence nandu 25th nov alwa

    my wife daugher and son birthdays are on 21st and anothe daugher on 12th reversal of 21 !!!! nanna birth day 2nd one numerical of above 12 and 21 my father’s birthday was also same as mine( day on;y!!!!!!!!!!) 2nd April

    nice to read all comments above thanks to each one of you

    ivatu kooda dina chennagi shruvaitu namage office suruvagodu
    8 A.M.

  35. Lakshmi Says:

    Praneshachar avarige,

    Thanks for your wishes. I reciprocate the same to you both. Three numbers are enough to remember all imp dates in your family. High mnemonic value !!!!

  36. rk Says:

    yen saar 1, 2 ra copyrights nimma haatira iro haagide?! 😉 best wishes to all of you. i feel good to know your day started well! let everyday be a great day for you.

    High mnemonic value !!!! lol 😀
    have a wonderful day!!

  37. TSSM Says:

    Ms.Veena Shivanna,

    with reference to your comments on
    ‘maasa(astrology) & the technicality(scientifics) behind the beleifs’

    there is an elaborate article on
    ‘ MUHURTHA (Electional Astrology)’
    by the renowned ‘B. V. RAMAN.’

    the website is:

    you may like to read :
    Chapter I – Importance of Muhurta
    Chapter XI- Marriage and with in this chapter- Electing a time for marriage

    The treatise is very elaborate, most of which I donot clearly understand.
    However, it is one of the few sites, which gives a lot of information on several issues.

    RK may have his own sources of info.

  38. rk Says:

    that’s a exhaustive article. thanks for providing the link. got to read it in leisure. have bookmarked this one. we might get answers to most queries here.

  39. praneshachar Says:

    copy right of 1 and 2 nandena hagiddare nilvella royalty kodbekalla.
    nov. tingalu rajotsava
    bloganalli yesto janara vivaha varshikotsava

  40. praneshachar Says:

    yenotu sir sanjay avara blogge niv yenadure madiddira!!!!
    nimma technical expertise kodi bega open agali

  41. rk Says:

    saar praneshachar,
    neevu, manege banni, khanditha ROYAL TEA kodthini!
    sanjay blog is visible now.
    have a great day!

  42. praneshachar Says:

    anantha vandanegalu. nimmannu bheti madalu mana tudiyuthide nimma addess mail madi sir
    akade baruthini ROYAL TEA gagi adakintha hetch nimma
    bhetiogagi ade ondu rasadouthna antha nanna bhavne
    ibbarigu alva

  43. praneshachar Says:

    sanjay blog open agtide adare kelasa madtilla
    yako gottilla

  44. rk Says:

    praneshachar avare,
    nimmanna bheti maadakke naanu uthsukanagiddini. nimma mail check maadi saar.
    wrt sanjay’s blog, i visited and commented just now. seems fine.

  45. Gunashekar D Says:

    Yes its true RK, “Haste not wasted”. Happy to hear YOUR sweet little love story.

    Adakke namma hiriyaru “Taalidavanu Baaliyaanu” anta gaade heliruvudu. Kaadu padeda hannu endigoo bahala sihi.

    Bhagavantana ashirvaada nimma mele sada heege erali.

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