Random Jottings on Facebook – 3

March 7, 2013

ಮೂರನೇ ಕ್ಲಾಸಲ್ಲಿ ನನ್ನ ಸ್ನೇಹಿತ ಸುರೇಶ್ ಮಣಿ ನನಗೆ ಹೇಳಿಕೊಟ್ಟ ಪಾಠ ಇನ್ನೂ ನೆನಪಿದೆ.

ಮಣಿ: ಕೋಳಿ ಕೂಗಿತು.
ರಾಮ: ಯಾವ ಕೋಳಿ?
ಮಣಿ: ಬಾತು ಕೋಳಿ.
ರಾಮ: ಯಾವ ಬಾತು?
ಮಣಿ: ಕೇಸರಿಭಾತು.
ರಾಮ: ಯಾವ ಕೇಸರಿ?
ಮಣಿ: ತಿನ್ನೊ ಕೇಸರಿ.
ರಾಮ: ಯಾವ ತಿನ್ನು?
ಮಣಿ: ಏಟು ತಿನ್ನು.
(ನನಗೆ ಹೊಡೀತಾನೆ).
ರಾಮ: ಯಾವ ಏಟು?
ಮಣಿ: ಗಾಂಧಿ ಏಟು.
ರಾಮ: ಯಾವ ಗಾಂಧಿ?
ಮಣಿ: ಮಹಾತ್ಮ ಗಾಂಧಿ.

ದಿನಕ್ಕೆ ಹತ್ತು ಸಲ ಈ ಆಟ. ಯಾವಾಗ್ಲೂ ನಾನೇ ಏಟು ತಿನ್ನಬೇಕು ಅಂತ ಅವನಾಸೆ. ದಿವಸ, ಮನೇಗೆ ಬರಕ್ಕೆ ಮುಂಚೆ, ಶಾಲೆಯ ಗೇಟ್ ಬಳಿ ಅವನಿಗೆ ಹತ್ತು ಏಟು ಹೋಡೆದು (ಒಂದೆರಡು ಕೊಸರು ಕೊಟ್ಟಿ) ತಪ್ಪಿಸಿಕೊಳ್ಳೋದೇ ಒಂದಾಟ!

***

Mom to son:

L.A.-ge hogi L-A- meerbeda.
___

Mom to daughter:
Erode-ge hogi ee road mareebeda.

***

don’t know about bengaluru-mysore corridor,
or mumbai-bengaluru corridor
but ನಮ್ ರೋಡಲ್ಲಿ ಇರೋರೆಲ್ಲ ಕಾರಿಡಾರೇ!

***

This morning, for a short stretch, to my left was an AUTO and to my right was an ALTO.

***

Remember those olden day taps with a long white cloth tied to it?

***

You’ve seen the I-PAD. Remember the WE-PAD (Wooden Examination Pad)?!

It’s that time of the year, when exam pads make a quick entry into every student’s life. During my school days, we would inherit the exam pads from our elders. Hence the wooden pad would have been used by our uncles, aunts, sisters, brothers and finally reach us.

The dark brown pad (with rounded edges) would have a smooth surface on the front and a rough textured surface at the back. The front would have a ‘SRI’, ‘OM’, names of some of the previous owners written in various styles, in blue or green ink. Black or Red ink was considered inauspicious! I had written “Da- 2 small vertical lines- Raj” in a self designed stylish 3D font in Kannada when I got the pad sometime in 3rd standard. Before that, I don’t remember using one. I had used blue sketch pen to write this.

I somehow hated to use the pad just for what it was meant for. Hence, as soon as the exams got over, I would use the pad as a cricket bat, a frisbee, a sword, a fan, a TT bat…. and thus the dark brown pad would have some broken edges by late April. I would also test my endurance levels by putting my fingers under the clip… 3 seconds and the fingers would be removed! The pad would have one small needle like thing near the clip. And this would scratch atleast one of my fingers during every exam. During 6th standard, I remember pasting a poster of Rajkumar at the back of the pad.
It was a huge inspiration for me!

My son’s plastic Ben-10 pad brought back these memories this morning.

***

Plastic pencil box always looked weak. And that too if it had a single opening. A magnetic pencil box was a fantasy. I was unable to come to terms with myself for a week when my first brother-in-law gifted me one when I was in 2nd standard. It had totally 5 openings – 2 each on both sides and one in the middle, that made the box look like a small diary book. My friends here were in awe with that box.

Friends in “far off” Cochin school also got to see my magnetic box. I remember boys asking in Malayalam: Idu evadannakitti?!

When I graduated from that to the powerful Geometry box, the main attraction were the Compass, Divider, Set square, blotting paper, and of course, if you managed to have a Hero Pen, then you looked a true HERO!

And then came the Ink sharing programme!

***

The only place
which has offered
a ‘level’ playing field
for a Shastri, Poojara
Pandit, Adhikaari,
Nawab, Merchant,
Maharaja, Yuvaraja,
Engineer, Contractor
is ‘Test’ Cricket!

***

In some old hotels, even today, Bournvita, Horlicks and Badam Powder bottles are not inside the kitchen. They’re kept next to the Cashier.

***

Book Cricket, and other types of Cricket I played!

During 4th and 5th standard, ‘book cricket’ entered our lives. I remember playing it quite intensely with my pal Hanuman in 5th standard. As I contracted Jaundice during that time, I was not allowed to go out and play (missed school for quite some days). I used to play book cricket alone after writing down the names of the players (one team was always India, the other varied Eng, WI, Aus etc..) on two pages (it resembled almost a complete scorecard).

The runs were scored by flipping the book open at random and the last digit of the right-side (even-numbered) page was counted as the number of runs scored. 0 (and sometimes 8) were assigned to special rules, typically a wicket was lost when a person scored 0 and scoring 8 would be substituted for a No ball run and an additional chance. To give an example, if the batting side opened the book at page 26, then 6 runs would be scored. For the toss, what was generally done was that both the players open a page and the one whose last digit is greater wins.

Other types of Cricket that I played: Hand cricket and leg cricket! (self explanatory)

And one of my neighbourhood friends, Umesh, had this indoor Cricket board game, where wickets were placed on a green circular piece of clothing, toy fielders were positioned, boundary ropes were kept and the batsman (i.e. you) had a tiny bat to hit the ball which were, shiny ball bearings, that would be dropped from about 5cms height by another player. If the ball went into the small opening near the feet (V-shaped) of the fielder, it was out. If the ball bearing touched the ropes, it was a boundary.

***

“There was a bit of pressure on me. I just got married, and my wife was worried I should perform. We knew that the new ball would do a bit.”

– Double Centurion Cheteshwar Pujara while receiving the MOM award today.

ಅಪಾರ್ಥ ಮಾಡ್ಕೋಬೇಡ್ರಪ್ಪ!

***

“India deserve a lot of credit.” – Michael Clarke
(Most Indians nowadays are living only on Credit!)

***

unlessyougivespaceforeveryoneandeverythingitwillgetterriblysuffocating.

***

ಒಂದ್ ಕಾರ್ ಇನ್ನೊಂದ್ ಕಾರ್-ಗೆ ಡಿಕ್ಕಿ ಹೊಡೀತು. ಬಂಪರ್ ಜಖಂ.
ಡ್ರೈವರ್ ೧: ಬಂಪರ್ ಹಾಕಿಸ್ಕೋಡಿ.
ಡ್ರೈವರ್ ೨: ಬಂಪರ್ ಪ್ರೈಜ್ ಎಷ್ಟು?

***

ರಿಕ್ಷಾ ಡ್ರೈವರ್ ಗಳಿಗೆ ಶ್ಂಕರ್ ನಾಗ್ ಬಿಟ್ರೆ, ‘ಸಂಜೆ ವಾಣಿ’ನೇ next favourite!

***

Wherever I see LAKME , I invariably read it as LAKUMI.

***

‘Yorkshire Weather’ since morning in Bengaluru. Perfect for Cricket, Frisbee and a long leisurely walk in the market.

***

The strong yet subtle smell that surrounds you in a petty shop – a unique mix of Banana (Pach Baale), Fresh Newspapers rolled between glass bottlles, Magazines hung on thin wires, Cigarette smoke, Chikki, Chewing Gum, Modern Bread, Notebook…. cannot be recreated/ replicated anywhere!

ಪೆಟ್ಟಿಗೆ ಅಂಗಡಿಗೆ ಜೈ!

***

Just like a Principal peeping into a class and walking away, the sun peeped once in Bengaluru disappeared.

***

After years of wear and tear, the Geometry box lid would start moving horizontally, a la Chiranjeevi while dancing! Once the Geometry box lid started acting loose, we would put a piece of paper and close it so that it sat tightly!

***

Blue & White Hawaii slipper and a ‘safety pin’! Made for each other (no more)!

***

I played with a short and fat scooter tyre and also a slim and trim cycle tyre… with which tyre did you play?

***

Ajji calls her grandson, who is listening to his i-pod, and asks him to buy get her a new Panchanga. The boy goes to a shop near 8th cross.

Boy: Uncle, Ondh Panchanga kodi.
Shopkeeper: Ontikoppal kodla?
Boy: Bisi idre kodi.
Shopkeeper: ?!?

(Boy thought the shopkeeper was offering him tea in a cup).

***

MET Dept. is getting a clearer picture on the Weather in different places through FB posts than the INSAT-1B* picture!

*FB posts are also a kind of IN-SAT…coz we sit inside and write!

***

ಬಾಗಿಲಿಗೆ ಹಾಕಿರೋ ಬೀಗ ಸ್ಟಕ್ ಆದಾಗ ಗಂಡ ಓಪನ್ ಮಾಡಕ್ಕ್ ಪ್ರಯತ್ನ ಪಡೋದು ನೋಡಿ ಹೆಂಡತಿ ಸಲಹೆ ಕೊಡ್ತಾಳೆ:
ಎಣ್ಣೆ ಹಾಕ್ ಬಿಟ್ಟ್ ಟ್ರಯ್ ಮಾಡಿ!

***

While in school, doubts would crop up on a Sunday evening, a day before the exams! Some of us would study late into the night. Seeing this rare occurrence, one or the other member in the house would invariably utter this phrase: YUDDHAKAALE SHASTRAABHYAASA!

***

On the last day of the exam, we would frantically run behind our seniors, asking, begging them to sell their textbooks to us, for half rate. The condition of the textbook would decide the final rate. Dirtier the book, lower the price.

By 9th and 10th std., even the GUIDES would be in demand! Remember MBD Guides (Malhotra Book Depot)!

***

ಗುಂಡಾಯನಮಃ. ಗುಂಡೋಪಂತ್. ಉಂಡಾಡಿಗುಂಡ. ಗುಂಡಪ್ಪ. ಗುಂಡನ ಬಗ್ಗೆ ಜೋಕ್ಸು. ಗುಂಡನ ಇಟ್ಕೊಂಡು ಗಾದೆ (ಎಲೆ ಎತ್ತೋ ಗುಂಡ ಅಂದರೆ…)
ವೀ ಲವ್ ಗುಂಡ!

***
ಅಡ್ಡ ರಸ್ತೇಲಿರೋದು ತಪ್ಪಲ್ಲ. ಅಡ್ಡ ದಾರೀಲಿರೋದು ತಪ್ಪು.
ಬೆಳ್ಳೂರ್ ಉವಾಚ

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One Response to “Random Jottings on Facebook – 3”


  1. […] Random Jottings on Facebook – 3 […]


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